tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-72690640684709066192024-03-05T19:17:26.507-08:00Stir in me a passion that my heart cannot containtime to kick apathy in the pants.Kathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07875437304634395430noreply@blogger.comBlogger67125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7269064068470906619.post-55762721771614595042018-09-24T20:06:00.001-07:002018-09-24T20:06:57.568-07:00now I understand, and it's time to leave the woodsTime to keep a chronicle of my journey. My journey of navigating my THIRTIES. So crazy!!! I will be thirty in just about six weeks, and I'm only just beginning to feel like I'm an adult. I'm only just beginning to be able to see beyond my thirtieth birthday, and how someday - much sooner than I think - I will turn forty, and fifty, and sixty...and what will I have to show for it? How will I handle it? What will my health be like? What will my bank account look like? What will my living situation be like? When I was eighteen, I was worried about what job I would have and whether or not I'd get married and have children and WHEN THE HECK WOULD THAT HAPPEN - but now I don't care so much about those things. There will always be jobs, and I know now that I can absolutely navigate through life as a single woman if that is what God has designated for me, but right now, today, in this season of life I'm in, it's time to get my affairs in order. Here are a few things I am going to be focusing on in the next 6-12 months, in the hopes of acting responsibly!<br />
<br />
1. Take care of my body and LOSE WEIGHT!!!<br />
I have been overweight ever since I can remember. That is a whole series of blog posts in and of themselves, so suffice it to say it is just time. I'm done looking and feeling like this. I'm tired of feeling bloated, and weak (physically and mentally, when it comes to food), and embarrassed of how I look in pictures. I've just begun a keto diet after successfully accomplishing two rounds of Whole30 this year, and I will be joining CrossFit next week to actually develop a little muscle and endurance. I remember a couple of years ago thinking, "If I don't make some kind of change in my health, I'm going to die. I'm literally going to die," and I'm honestly still a little worried that I'll have a heart attack in my thirties, so I'm going to do what I can to get this weight off my body!<br />
<br />
2. Pay off debts and start saving again!<br />
I'm very fortunate to not have student loans, but I still have a few car payments and a little credit card debt, and I am determined to pay them off within a year. It's completely doable, I just need to start a budget. I've just started reading Dave Ramsey, and I hear he's pretty knowledgeable about this subject, so I feel very hopeful :)<br />
<br />
3. Build my Plexus business.<br />
If someone gave you an opportunity for complete and utter financial freedom (think a six-figure income and above) as well as a total 180 change health-wise, and you were surrounding yourself with inspirational, compassionate, passionate people in the process, wouldn't you want to be part of that? Or if you had a goal in mind, such as getting out of debt and being able to buy a house and being able to support your family members and give generously to your church and your ministries, and this was the best way to accomplish that goal, wouldn't you want to do it? I definitely do. I'm definitely super intimidated by the thought of working my Plexus business, but it is probably the most rewarding opportunity I think I've ever had, and it excites me like few other things have in my life!<br />
<br />
4. Take care of my house.<br />
Literally I will never understand why it is SO. DADGUM. DIFFICULT for me to just HANG UP MY CLOTHES. I take my clothes off and just throw them on the floor, and it seems like the biggest job in the world to hang them up! (I don't have a dresser, I just hang all my clothes in my closet, so I don't even have to fold them!! How easy should it be to hang up my clothes, and yet...I just can't make myself do it.) But I am going to somehow train myself to get in the habit of hanging up my clothes, making my bed, keeping my bathroom clean and organized, keeping clutter at bay, and keeping a clean and tidy home. Even if I never get married or have children, my home needs to be clean and organized, and I'm determined to get in the habit of making it so.<br />
<br />
Those are the main things I'll be focusing on for the next 6-12 months. I plan to update this blog with details of my journey! I want to see how God brings me from here to there!!!<br />
<br />
"....So they came forward and placed their feet on [the necks of the captured kings]. Joshua said to them, 'Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged. Be strong and courageous. This is what the Lord will do to all the enemies you are going to fight.'" ~Joshua 10:24b-25Kathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07875437304634395430noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7269064068470906619.post-7413999423695236792017-11-06T20:27:00.002-08:002017-11-06T20:27:50.225-08:00if this was a movieTime for an updated "quotes from 20 favorite movies" because I'm bored and want to. BOOM!<br />
<br />
<br />
1. "I am glad to be here with you, Samwise Gamgee, here at the end of all things.<br />
<br />
2. "NO! You were wrong about the world. You were wrong about me! And I will NEVER let you use my hair again!!"<br />
<br />
3. "Up where the smoke is all billowed and curled, 'tween pavement and stars is the chimney sweep's world...where there's hardly no day, nor hardly no night, there's things half in shadow...and halfway in light. On the rooftops of London - coo! what a sight!"<br />
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4. "Hey, Dad."<br />"Hey, big puffy version of Junebug. Where you been?"<br />"Oh, just out, dealing with things way beyond my maturity level."<br />
<br />
5. "And though I'll think of you, I guess, until the day I die, I think I miss you less and less as every day goes by, Johanna..."<br />
<br />
6. "Let me put it this way. Have you heard of Plato? Aristotle? Socrates?"<br />"Yes."<br />"Morons."<br />
<br />
7. "And, as I always say, if it's not Baroque, don't fix it."<br />
<br />
8. "I think you're the kindest, sweetest, prettiest person I ever met in my life. I've never seen anyone that's nicer to people than you are. The first time I saw you...something happened to me. I've never told you...but I knew that I wanted to hold you as hard as I could. I don't deserve someone like you. But if I ever could, I swear I would love you for the rest of my life."<br />
<br />
9. "And those are the words of a gentleman? From the first moment I met you, your arrogance and conceit, your selfish disdain for the feelings of others, made me realize that you were the last man on earth whom I could ever be prevailed upon to marry."<br />
<br />
10. "The night is a very dark time for me."<br />"It's dark for everyone, stupid!"<br />"Not for Alaskans or dudes with night vision goggles!!"<br />
<br />
11. "Now, off you go...for you SHALL go to the ball!"<br />
<br />
12. "Lina, you were gorgeous!"<br />"Yeah, Lina, you looked pretty good for a girl."<br />
<br />
13. "Now, just a minute! I want you to know that my interest in you is purely scientific. I'm just a cold-blooded scientist, and I'm writing an anthropological study for this museum. It's called 'Modern Man - What Is It? The name is Claire Huddeson."<br />
<br />
14. "Snow White is dead. One of God's great mysteries is His plan for each and every one of us.<br />"Speed it up."<br />"Snow White lived, she died, God rest her soul. There'll be a buffet lunch served at two."<br />
<br />
15. "Now this is exactly the type of performance you would expect to see at the international championship of collegiate a capella, am I right, Gail?"<br />"Oh, John, you're so right, everything else seems wrong."<br />
<br />
16. "Ladies and gentlemen, this is your stewardess speaking. We regret any inconvenience the sudden cabin movement might have caused. This is due to periodic air pockets we encounter, there's no reason to become alarmed, and we hope you enjoy the rest of your flight. By the way...is there anyone on board who knows how to fly a plane?"<br />
<br />
17. "Now, I know Shakespeare's a dead white guy, but he knows his shit, so we can overlook that. I want you all to write your own version of this sonnet. ...Yes, Miss I Have An Opinion About Everything?"<br />
<br />
18. "Harry, you are so loved. Mama loves you. Daddy loves you. Harry, be safe. Be strong."<br />
<br />
19. "My dear partner. When what's left of you gets around to what's left to be gotten, what's left to be gotten won't be worth getting, whatever it is you've got left."<br />
"I figure out what that means, I'll come up with a crushing reply."<br />
<br />
20. "A wedding? I love weddings! Drinks all around! ...I know, I know. Clap him in irons, right?"<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
Just gotta update this list every few years. Plenty of them are still the same no matter what!!!<br />
<br />
Kathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07875437304634395430noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7269064068470906619.post-50913448052147135162017-03-21T14:01:00.002-07:002017-03-21T14:01:51.305-07:00for once it might be grand to have someone understandIt's time to dust off this old thing again. And by "this old thing," I mean any ability I've ever had to write a blog post. Many brain muscles I used to use constantly are now sadly atrophied. I used to have almost an eidetic memory, and now I struggle to remember much of what used to come naturally. I used to be able to memorize things (particularly passages of Scripture!) almost at a glance or a listen, and now my brain actually hurts after trying to memorize more than about three sentences. And I used to write nearly every day, whether it was journaling, or stories, or blog posts...and now the last post I wrote here was a year and a half ago. It's sad, really, how little I write these days. This is an attempt to begin to revive my love for writing, I suppose, however misguided an attempt it might turn out!<br />
<br />
So, in the most recent news possible, I just went to see the new Beauty and the Beast! I had many doubts about it when I first heard it would be remade. My doubts were greatly intensified upon learning that Emma Watson had been cast as Belle. I did not think she could possibly play the character well. And while her performance was better than I feared, still I think the biggest flaw in the 2017 remake is in its main character.<br />
<br />
Belle, or at least the animated 1991 rendition of the character, had always been my favorite Disney princess, because I shared her love for books, and because I could see that there was "something there," as the song went: Belle was different, and it wasn't merely her love of books that made her so. She was good. She was kind. She was smart, she was loving, and she was brave. She didn't care what others thought of her, but not because she was better than them - she only wanted <i>more</i> than they did, because her mind had been opened to the idea of more. Belle selflessly gave herself up for her father, and yet she had the kindness and grace to treat the Beast with respect (and she had the courage to talk to him on his own level: see the scene where she treats his wound and thanks him for saving her life). Belle is unlike any Disney princess that came before her, and unlike any that followed her, and I believe it is her grace and kindness coupled with her education that make her so.<br />
<br />
Yet, as played by the admittedly well-suited Ms. Watson, Belle is not much like her animated counterpart. Watson's Belle is the outcast of her village, a woman ahead of her time. Belle is an inventor, and one of (if not the only) few females in her village who are literate. Belle invents a washing machine, and while it washes her clothes, she assists a little girl with some reading. The village schoolmaster sees this, and is outraged that she would be teaching "ANOTHER girl to read!" And the rest of the villagers actually agree with him! And they break Belle's washing machine and throw her wet clothes on the ground. No, seriously.<br />
<br />
The villagers clearly don't know what to make of Belle, and some are frightened by her unorthodox behavior and manner of dress (she wears <i>bloomers</i> under her dresses, and <i>no stockings!</i>), but Belle seems just as uncomfortable and wary of them as they are of her. And as snobby as some villagers are towards her, Belle seems just as snobby towards them. Belle knows she's better educated, more free-spirited, more open-minded, more creative, and more beautiful than the rest of her village, and yet she doesn't seem to handle this with much grace. She doesn't seem to care about sharing her education (beyond this odd little scene of showing the girl how to read), she doesn't try to suggest to anyone in the village that there might be more to the scope of life than the mundane daily grind they know, and she is never shown trying to build relationships with anyone in her village. She complains that the owner of the bookshop is the only other person in the village who reads, but she never tries to tell anyone else of the wonders and joy of reading.<br />
<br />
Belle wonders aloud to her father if he thinks she's "odd." I would have liked to see her ask this question of a female, perhaps a village acquaintance she exchanges pleasantries with at least. But she passes by nearly everyone in the village without giving them a second glance, and is downright rude to Gaston when he asks if he might join her and her father for dinner. (Yeah, yeah, he's stuck up, conceited, and definitely doesn't deserve to marry her, but seriously, it is possible to decline the offer of a date in a straight forward way WITHOUT being rude. And I would argue that even people as self-absorbed as Gaston deserve basic politeness.) For all her championing of feminism, I would have liked to see Emma Watson push for Belle to have a female friend in the village. Watson is the one who pushed for Belle to be the inventor rather than her father, and for Belle to take a more active role in her own story. But Belle has no friends save for her father, and eventually, the Beast. Would it not have been far more progressive to have given her a true female friend? <br />
<br />
I think the biggest issue I have with Watson's portrayal of Belle is that at the end of the movie, Belle does not appear to have gone through any significant character development. She started the movie as an outcast, a weirdo, an outsider in her own village, and does not have to change anything about herself or learn any significant lessons in order to get her happily ever after. She is never forced to ask herself what <i>she</i> could do to better her life; it seems she thinks the villagers, Gaston, the Beast, or maybe even life itself ought to change to suit her. Even her relationship with her father, and the backstory of her mother, do not seem to develop the character of Belle. <br />
<br />
Even, dare I suggest, her ability to see the human within the Beast does little for Belle. The whole point of this "tale as old as time" is that Belle is meant to be the one who can see beyond the shallowness of looks to find what's really important - but she never turns this focus within herself, when perhaps she should.<br />
<br />
Belle is the most beautiful woman in her village, and while she doesn't care about being beautiful, she never seems to ask herself how <i>she</i> can bring out the beauty in others around her. She only bothers with the Beast because A) he saved her life, and B) he eventually reveals that he has read most of the books in his extensive library. Belle seems to lack sincere interest in anyone around her unless it turns out they have some manner of education, but she never seems interested in educating anyone herself. <br />
<br />
This seems in sharp contrast to Cinderella, particularly the 2015 remake where Cinderella is played by Lily James. Both Disney versions of the character have infused her with grace, kindness, and gentleness, which many interpret as weakness and passivity. But I do love the wisdom and humility displayed by Cinderella:<br />
<br />
"Have courage, and be kind."<br />
"Just because it's what's done, doesn't mean it's what should be done!"<br />
"And Ella continued to see the world, not as it was, but as it could be, if only you believe in courage, and kindness..."<br />
"Would who she was - who she <i>really </i>was - be enough? This is perhaps the greatest risk any of us will ever take: to be seen as we truly are."<br />
"Your majesty, I am no princess. I have no carriage, no parents, no dowry - I do not even know if that slipper will fit. But if it does, will you take me as I am? A good, honest, country girl, who loves you."<br />
<br />
And most of all, the moment when Ella turns to her stepmother and says, "I forgive you."<br />
<br />
There are no such pivotal developmental moments for Belle, and therein lies the whole problem with the latest rendition of the tale as old as time...<br />
<br />
"I want adventure in the great wide somewhere, I want it more than I can tell! And for once it might be grand to have someone understand: I want so much more than they've got planned..."<br />
"New, and a bit alarming; who'd have ever thought that this could be? True that he's no Prince Charming...but there's something in him that I simply didn't see."<br />
"He's no monster, Gaston, YOU are!"<br />
"For who could ever learn to love...a beast?"<br />
<br />
For all Belle's education, for all her beauty, for all her desire for more from life and her creativity and her ability to see past a person's looks, I'd rather emulate Cinderella any day. I'd rather have courage and be kind, and be vulnerable, and real, and true, and good, and honest, and loving, and forgiving. <br />
<br />
So there you have it. Beauty and the Beast was beautiful, and refreshing, and nostalgic, and I definitely appreciated a few details that fill in some of the gaping plot holes from the 1991 animated film...but for all those good qualities, both the movie and its lead character miss the mark overall. Kathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07875437304634395430noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7269064068470906619.post-8430616448812327062015-09-01T13:40:00.004-07:002015-09-01T13:40:57.098-07:00whose unfailing mercy is solid and clear*an open letter to Anna Duggar*<br />
<br />
Dear Anna Duggar,<br />
<br />
You don't know me. I don't know you. I've never even watched 19 Kids And Counting, except for Jill and Jessa's wedding episodes. I know nothing about you other than what is in the news and what I have read online about the Duggar family, which isn't exactly extensive information, never mind its accuracy. But I still feel a connection with you.<br />
<br />
I know we do not believe the same things about many issues, but I also know that we worship the same God. And that is the most important thing about us. And the main reason I am writing this.<br />
<br />
I cannot even imagine what you are going through right now. I cannot imagine what you are thinking and feeling day to day, hour to hour. As you care for your children, including a newborn, I cannot imagine what you say to them. What you have told them about their daddy (Josh Duggar), and what he has done (lied, hidden a secret porn addiction, been unfaithful to his wife), and where he is now (in rehab), and why he is there (to get help, to try and turn his life around). I do not know who you surround yourself with, besides your children. I know you have no lack of siblings (7 of your own, and 18 in-laws) to shower you with love and care, and I hope they are all doing just that. <br />
<br />
There are a few things I wanted to share with you. First of all, you are loved.<br />
<br />
You, Anna Duggar, are loved.<br />
<br />
Not just by your children, or your parents, or your other family and friends. Not just by fans. Not even just by people like me, who love you because you are a sister in Christ, even though we've never met.<br />
<br />
You, Anna Duggar, are loved by the King of kings and the Lord of lords. <br />
You are loved by God the Father, the Creator, the Redeemer, the Giver of every good and perfect gift from above (James 1:17).<br />
You are loved by Jesus the Son, who gave His life for you, Anna Duggar, on the cross, so that you could have salvation and spend eternity with Him, the perfect Savior, Friend, and Lamb of God who takes away the sin of the world (John 1:29). <br />
You are loved by the Holy Spirit, who helps you in your weakness, intercedes for you before the Father with groans that words cannot express, who prays for you when you do not know how to pray (Romans 8:26).<br />
<br />
I've been on your Instagram account and those of several other Duggar family members, and the comments there are awful. People telling you to ditch your husband and your marriage, to get as far away from Josh as fast as you can, people bashing him and his hypocrisy, people offering their opinions on subjects they know next to nothing about. People presuming to speak as if they know Josh's thoughts and feelings, what is best for you, what your parents or your in-laws are telling you to do, what God is doing in your own heart, what the Scriptures say you should do. It's terrible, and honestly, quite confusing. I know that I know only slightly more than these people do, and I just want to share a few thoughts with you.<br />
<br />
Scripturally, marriage is established by God as an exclusive, permanent, and sacred union between one man and one woman (Genesis 1:27, 2:18, 20, 22-25; Matthew 19:6; Mark 10:9; 1 Corinthians 7:25). I especially love the phrase in the Matthew and Mark verses: "...what God has joined together, let no man separate." <br />
<br />
However, there is only one clear Scriptural basis for divorce, and Anna, you have every right to employ it: that of marital unfaithfulness, <i>porneia</i>, which may include adultery and/or homosexual activities (Matthew 19:9). However, Christians are not obligated to divorce under these circumstances.<br />
Even though there is a biblical basis for divorce (one's spouse is guilty of <i>porneia</i>)<i></i>, the person should seek to persevere and protect the marriage as long as there is any possibility of repentance (Malachi 2:16, Matthew 19:6; 1 Corinthians 7). The first steps are to pray, seek biblical counseling through a local church or an organization such as Peacemakers, and trust God to bring reconciliation. God has done many miracles in marriages through this approach.<br />
Those seeking to remarry after divorce should stay single as long as there is any possibility of a reconciliation (1 Corinthians 7:10-11). There is always this possibility until the offending person remarries or dies.<br />
<br />
Anna Duggar, I do not know you, and I do not know the details of what Josh has done. I do not know his heart or yours, or how you live your lives day to day, or how you feel about Josh and what he has done. All I can tell you is that I'm so very, very sorry for you, and that I have been praying for you, and I am so rooting for you to save your marriage. I will not offer my opinion on Josh or what he has done, except to say it is obvious he has sinned against God and against you, and that you have every Scriptural right to divorce him if you choose.<br />
<br />
But I pray that you will find a way to forgive Josh. That you will find a way to reconcile with him. That you will find a way to save your marriage with him. That you will find a way to forgive him, as Christ has forgiven him. That you will know that kindness and forgiveness <i>does not mean you are weakly giving in</i>, but actually utilizing a strength beyond that of man. You could never forgive Josh or reconcile with him simply because you wanted to, because why would anyone ever want to forgive someone who has hurt them and betrayed their trust in this way? The only way you can do it is through a power far greater than your own, and because of a love far stronger than your own.<br />
<br />
Keep strong, Anna Duggar. Know that there are loads of women out there rooting for you, myself included, and that we think you are a strong, beautiful, kind, loving, forgiving woman, worthy of great respect and love. I hope Josh's heart is repentant, and that the two of you can reconcile and come out of this horrible situation with healing and forgiveness. I hope you can find comfort in your children, and in Scripture, and in your faith, and in the beauty of the little things. I hope you can find a way to laugh and have joy, and I hope you can indulge in the relief that a good cry can bring, and I hope you can sleep deeply and have rest. Eat a piece or two (or seven or eight) of your favorite chocolate (I recommend Dove chocolate myself), and take a few deep breaths. <br />
<br />
Be strong, Anna Duggar. I'm rooting for you. <br />
<br />
"Be strong and courageous; do not be terrified and do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God is with you wherever you go." ~Joshua 1:9<br />
<br />
The Spirit of the Lord <span class="small-caps" style="font-variant: small-caps;">God</span> is upon me,<br /><span class="indent-1"><span class="indent-1-breaks"> </span><span class="text Isa-61-1">because the <span class="small-caps" style="font-variant: small-caps;">Lord</span> has <sup class="crossreference" data-cr="#cen-ESV-18845B" data-link="(<a href="#cen-ESV-18845B" title="See cross-reference B">B</a>)"></sup>anointed me</span></span><br /><span class="text Isa-61-1">to bring good news to the poor;</span><br /><span class="indent-1"><span class="indent-1-breaks"> </span><span class="text Isa-61-1">he has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted,</span></span><br /><span class="text Isa-61-1">to proclaim liberty to the captives,</span><br /><span class="indent-1"><span class="indent-1-breaks"> </span><span class="text Isa-61-1">and <sup class="crossreference" data-cr="#cen-ESV-18845C" data-link="(<a href="#cen-ESV-18845C" title="See cross-reference C">C</a>)"></sup>the opening of the prison to those who are bound;</span></span><br /><span class="text Isa-61-2" id="en-ESV-18846"><sup class="versenum">2 </sup><sup class="crossreference" data-cr="#cen-ESV-18846D" data-link="(<a href="#cen-ESV-18846D" title="See cross-reference D">D</a>)"></sup>to proclaim the year of the <span class="small-caps" style="font-variant: small-caps;">Lord</span>'s favor,</span><br /><span class="indent-1"><span class="indent-1-breaks"> </span><span class="text Isa-61-2"><sup class="crossreference" data-cr="#cen-ESV-18846E" data-link="(<a href="#cen-ESV-18846E" title="See cross-reference E">E</a>)"></sup>and the day of vengeance of our God;</span></span><br /><span class="indent-1"><span class="indent-1-breaks"> </span><span class="text Isa-61-2">to comfort all who mourn;</span></span><br /><span class="text Isa-61-3" id="en-ESV-18847"><sup class="versenum">3 </sup>to grant to those who mourn in Zion—</span><br /><span class="indent-1"><span class="indent-1-breaks"> </span><span class="text Isa-61-3"><sup class="crossreference" data-cr="#cen-ESV-18847F" data-link="(<a href="#cen-ESV-18847F" title="See cross-reference F">F</a>)"></sup>to give them a beautiful headdress instead of ashes,</span></span><br /><span class="text Isa-61-3"><sup class="crossreference" data-cr="#cen-ESV-18847G" data-link="(<a href="#cen-ESV-18847G" title="See cross-reference G">G</a>)"></sup>the oil of gladness instead of mourning,</span><br /><span class="indent-1"><span class="indent-1-breaks"> </span><span class="text Isa-61-3">the garment of praise instead of a faint spirit;</span></span><br /><span class="text Isa-61-3"><sup class="crossreference" data-cr="#cen-ESV-18847H" data-link="(<a href="#cen-ESV-18847H" title="See cross-reference H">H</a>)"></sup>that they may be called oaks of righteousness,</span><br /><span class="indent-1"><span class="indent-1-breaks"> </span><span class="text Isa-61-3">the planting of the <span class="small-caps" style="font-variant: small-caps;">Lord</span>, <sup class="crossreference" data-cr="#cen-ESV-18847I" data-link="(<a href="#cen-ESV-18847I" title="See cross-reference I">I</a>)"></sup>that he may be glorified.</span></span><br /><span class="text Isa-61-4" id="en-ESV-18848"><sup class="versenum">4 </sup><sup class="crossreference" data-cr="#cen-ESV-18848J" data-link="(<a href="#cen-ESV-18848J" title="See cross-reference J">J</a>)"></sup>They shall build up the ancient ruins;</span><br /><span class="indent-1"><span class="indent-1-breaks"> </span><span class="text Isa-61-4">they shall raise up the former devastations;</span></span><br /><span class="text Isa-61-4">they shall repair the ruined cities,</span><br /><span class="indent-1"><span class="indent-1-breaks"> </span><span class="text Isa-61-4">the devastations of many generations.</span></span><br />
<span class="indent-1"><span class="text Isa-61-4">~Isaiah 61:1-4</span></span><b></b><i></i><u></u><sub></sub><sup></sup><strike></strike><br />
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Bless the <span class="small-caps" style="font-variant: small-caps;">Lord</span>, O my soul,<br /><span class="indent-1"><span class="indent-1-breaks"> </span><span class="text Ps-103-1">and all that is within me,</span></span><br /><span class="indent-1"><span class="indent-1-breaks"> </span><span class="text Ps-103-1">bless his holy name!</span></span><br /><span class="text Ps-103-2" id="en-ESV-15552"><sup class="versenum">2 </sup><sup class="crossreference" data-cr="#cen-ESV-15552B" data-link="(<a href="#cen-ESV-15552B" title="See cross-reference B">B</a>)"></sup>Bless the <span class="small-caps" style="font-variant: small-caps;">Lord</span>, O my soul,</span><br /><span class="indent-1"><span class="indent-1-breaks"> </span><span class="text Ps-103-2">and <sup class="crossreference" data-cr="#cen-ESV-15552C" data-link="(<a href="#cen-ESV-15552C" title="See cross-reference C">C</a>)"></sup>forget not all his benefits,</span></span><br /><span class="text Ps-103-3" id="en-ESV-15553"><sup class="versenum">3 </sup>who <sup class="crossreference" data-cr="#cen-ESV-15553D" data-link="(<a href="#cen-ESV-15553D" title="See cross-reference D">D</a>)"></sup>forgives all your iniquity,</span><br /><span class="indent-1"><span class="indent-1-breaks"> </span><span class="text Ps-103-3">who <sup class="crossreference" data-cr="#cen-ESV-15553E" data-link="(<a href="#cen-ESV-15553E" title="See cross-reference E">E</a>)"></sup>heals all your diseases,</span></span><br /><span class="text Ps-103-4" id="en-ESV-15554"><sup class="versenum">4 </sup>who <sup class="crossreference" data-cr="#cen-ESV-15554F" data-link="(<a href="#cen-ESV-15554F" title="See cross-reference F">F</a>)"></sup>redeems your life from the pit,</span><br /><span class="indent-1"><span class="indent-1-breaks"> </span><span class="text Ps-103-4">who <sup class="crossreference" data-cr="#cen-ESV-15554G" data-link="(<a href="#cen-ESV-15554G" title="See cross-reference G">G</a>)"></sup>crowns you with steadfast love and mercy,</span></span><br /><span class="text Ps-103-5" id="en-ESV-15555"><sup class="versenum">5 </sup>who <sup class="crossreference" data-cr="#cen-ESV-15555H" data-link="(<a href="#cen-ESV-15555H" title="See cross-reference H">H</a>)"></sup>satisfies you with good</span><br /><span class="indent-1"><span class="indent-1-breaks"> </span><span class="text Ps-103-5">so that your youth is renewed like <sup class="crossreference" data-cr="#cen-ESV-15555I" data-link="(<a href="#cen-ESV-15555I" title="See cross-reference I">I</a>)"></sup>the eagle's.</span></span><br />
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<span class="indent-1"><span class="text Ps-103-5"></span></span>~Psalm 103:1-5</div>
<br />Kathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07875437304634395430noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7269064068470906619.post-64143414218847614612014-07-13T17:26:00.000-07:002014-07-13T17:29:00.414-07:00but I still haven't found what I'm looking forLet me just say it right now: being a twenty-something kind of sucks.<br />
<br />
Being a <em>single</em> twenty-something also kind of sucks.<br />
<br />
At least in my opinion/experience, anyway. Seriously, what's a single 25-year-old woman to do, who still hasn't graduated from college, is still living with her parents (and on their dime and insurance, for the most part), and has just gone back to the job she first got when she was 17? Ugh. UGH UGH UGH!!! Being a twenty-something is one of the worst first-world problems EVER! Truly, it's very uncomfortable, and it doesn't help that I don't have very many close friends who are also fellow twenty-somethings to commiserate with. <br />
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So if you are reading this, and you are a twenty-something, and you find your life to be very frustrating because it doesn't look at all the way you thought it would when you were 17, can you just take a moment and commiserate with me right now? Send me your commiseration vibes. I'm feeling them now. (Then again, maybe those are just my own vibes coming back around at me. Who can say.)<br />
<br />
Now...maybe you are a <em>Christian</em> twenty-something and frustrated by your life, but you know you shouldn't be because really you are incredibly blessed. <br />
Maybe you have amazing parents, who allow you to live with them and who support you financially and pay some or all of your college tuition. <br />
Maybe you have a couple of close friends whom you've known since elementary school, and who you still consider to be some of your best friends. <br />
Maybe you are grateful to be single, because being in a relationship is so much effort, and you've been badly hurt in the past. Maybe Christ fills you with His joy, His peace, His love, and you have to just take a moment and let yourself experience it to the fullest. <br />
Maybe you are involved in some sort of ministry in your church - maybe you work with children or youth, and you love getting to spend time with those kids and laugh with them and watch them grow and ache when you know that if they would just <em>listen </em>and ask God for guidance and help, they would receive it and understand! <br />
Maybe you are part of a small group, at church or somewhere else, and you love the Bible studies you do and the people who study with you, even if you don't know most of them that well.<br />
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Maybe there are tons of other things too, and you <em>know</em> your life has truly been richly blessed...but it's hard to remember sometimes because it just seems that there's something missing.<br />
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Maybe you're like me, and you are SO READY TO NOT BE SINGLE ANYMORE. Or maybe it's not anything to do with being single necessarily, but there is just one thing in your life that you feel like you want more than anything, and it would be SO EASY for God to give that thing to you, but He just hasn't, for some reason.<br />
<br />
Maybe you want a boyfriend/girlfriend, or really a husband/wife. Maybe you even have a specific person in mind, and maybe they even like you back, but for whatever reason, you can't be together. If you could just be in a relationship, you know you'd have everything you ever wanted. Heck, if God would even allow you to have a <em>chance</em> at a relationship, at least you'd know what it's like either way.<br />
Maybe you want children, desperately, and are unable to have them. If God would just give you that precious little life, you would raise it to know Him and love Him as best you could. Your life would be complete if only you could have that son or daughter, and you would truly be the best parent you knew how to be. <br />
Maybe you want a certain job, and you know you would be SO GOOD at it, and that your having that job would benefit the company, or your co-workers, or the people you serve. If only you could have that job, you'd have plenty of money, and you could donate some to charities or your church, and you can just taste how successful and richly blessed your life would be, if you could just have the job.<br />
Maybe you want to pack up and move to New York, or L.A., or Chicago, or London, or Africa, or Australia, or anywhere but the place you currently are, where you feel trapped. If only you could get out of this one-horse town, wherever you are, you'd be able to leave the past behind and finally start really living your life, and you would have a chance to be content and happy.<br />
Maybe you just want to lose some weight. If you could lose ten pounds, or twenty, then you could shop at certain stores and dress in certain ways, and that would solve so many issues that are wrong in your life. Right?<br />
<br />
<br />
It's not like it'd be hard for God to fulfill that one thing that we want so badly. God can do anything, right? He loves us, doesn't He? And He wants to give us every good thing, according to the Bible (see Luke 11:9-13, Matthew 7:12, Psalm 37:4). Why won't He just do that <em>one thing</em> that He knows would bring us so much happiness, and that would be so good for us, and probably benefit a lot of other people too?? It would be so simple for Him, and so good for us. Why doesn't He just do it?<br />
<br />
Unfortunately, my answer to that question is just this: I don't know.<br />
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I really, really wish I knew why God does what He does, and doesn't do the things He doesn't do. I don't know why He has never let me have a boyfriend, which is something I've wanted ever since I can remember. I don't know why I'm 25 and still not graduated from college yet. I don't know why I am fully in the midst of my twenty-something life and greatly disliking being here. And I don't know why He hasn't done whatever thing you are desperate for Him to do in your life, that would complete it and make you so happy you can almost feel it already.<br />
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Most blog posts I've read on this subject are from the POV of someone who was waiting for that one thing, and after what seemed like forever to them, they finally received it, and are now passing on their wisdom that whatever it is is worth the wait. Well, I'm sure that's true. However, all those blog posts leave kind of a bad taste in my mouth, because all I can think when I read them is: "That's easy for <em>you</em> to say." They've finally gotten what they want! And they've gotten what <em>I</em> want, too! It's not fair! I'm still here, waiting, twiddling my thumbs, wondering if God will ever allow me to be in a relationship, wondering if I'll ever get married or have children, or even graduate college.<br />
<br />
And that sucks.<br />
<br />
Fellow twenty-somethings, let's just take a minute and agree that being in this stage of life, and waiting on whatever it is that we're all waiting on, <em>sucks.</em> It really, really does. It sucks that we're still waiting, it sucks that we don't have what we want, and it sucks that we don't know <em>why</em> God hasn't allowed us to have what we want. It sucks that we don't know His plan or understand His timing, and it sucks that His plan and timing are so different from ours. And can we also just admit that it's usually not very comforting when people try to comfort us by reminding us that our lives are "all in God's plan"? <br />
<br />
Yes, of <em>course</em> God has a plan for our lives. Of <em>course</em> His plan is far, far better than anything we could ever have planned for ourselves. And of <em>course</em> we need to seek our security and our identity and our everything in Him, instead of in that one thing we want so badly. Of <em>course</em> that one thing can never solve our problems, or fulfill us, or complete our lives.<br />
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<em>Only Jesus Christ can do that.</em><br />
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Believe me, I know this. I know it in my head, and I have to work every day to try and get my heart to realize it too.<br />
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But can we just take a moment and say that we're really tired of waiting? And that sometimes, the most helpful thing to do is express frustration, rather than smother that frustration with guilt because we know "God has a plan for our lives"? And that <em>it's okay</em> to be frustrated, and to express that frustration (as long as you do so appropriately)??<br />
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Okay. Moment taken. Thank you.<br />
<br />
"Because Your steadfast love is better than life, my lips will glorify You." ~Psalm 63:3, NIV<br />
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"But my life is worth nothing to me unless I use it for finishing the work assigned me by the Lord Jesus - the work of telling others the Good News about the wonderful grace of God." ~Acts 20:24, NLT<br />
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"So if you're serious about living this new resurrection life with Christ, <em>act</em> like it. Pursue the things over which Christ presides. Don't shuffle along, eyes to the ground, absorbed in the things right in front of you. Look up, and be alert to what is going on around Christ - that's where the action is. See things from <em>His</em> perspective." ~Colossians 3:1-2, MSG<br />
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God is really the only thing worth wanting, worth having, worth living for. We all know that, deep down. God, help us act that way! Help us see things from Your perspective, and live like we are serious about You. Give us patience as long as we do not have the things we so desire, and help us control our desires for those things. Let them never overshadow You in our lives. Help us delight ourselves in You first and foremost.<br />
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And to finish, one of my favorite verses (which coincidentally inspired the lantern scene in <em>Tangled</em>...go watch that movie again immediately and see that it totally fits!):<br />
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"Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows." ~James 1:17, NIVKathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07875437304634395430noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7269064068470906619.post-85307136206047053932014-05-14T07:51:00.001-07:002014-05-17T21:13:46.851-07:00tales as old as timeMy own definitive ranking of all the <em>official</em> Disney princesses, ranked from worst to best. That's right, only the 13 official Disney princesses are being ranked here, though there is certainly plenty to be said for the likes of Alice, Wendy, Megara, Nala, Esmerelda, and the rest. <br />
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13. Snow White (<em>Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs,</em> 1937)<br />
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In her defense, poor, naïve little Snow White is a victim of her time period. Had <em>Snow White</em> been made even ten years later, its titular character might have been more fleshed out, more developed, more active, and less surreal. But 78 years' hindsight leaves much to be desired in her character. Homegirl spends her entire movie simpering as she scrubs floors for her wicked stepmother, cooks and cleans for seven men, and talks to woodland creatures. If she could do any of those things with her eyes actually open (seriously, unless she's frightened, her eyes are almost completely drooped shut for the whole movie), I might like her a little bit better. Unfortunately, her purity and sweetness combined with the feminism (or lack thereof) of the 1930's make for one thoroughly weak, passive princess who remains remarkable almost solely because of her status as the main character of the first ever full-length animated feature. If she had shown any sort of spunk, rebellion, wit, or desire to do anything other than cook, clean, or marry a prince, Snow White might have received a higher ranking.<br />
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Best quote:<br />
"I'm awfully sorry. I didn't mean to frighten you. But you don't know what I've been through. And all because I was afraid. I'm so ashamed of the fuss I've made."<br />
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12. Merida (<em>Brave</em>, 2012)<br />
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I honestly did not particularly like both <em>Brave</em> as a movie and its lead protagonist. I appreciate how fiery and independent Merida is, and I certainly admire how she had the guts to fight for her freedom from cultural paradigm and avoid a completely undesired marriage. But I spent most of the movie thinking she was mostly just a brat. Yes, her mother should have been more understanding of Merida's personality and desires and who Merida truly was, rather than trying so hard to transform her into a "proper princess." But on the other hand, Merida needed to understand that everyone has to make sacrifices for a greater good than their own wants and desires, whether they are a princess or not. And putting a spell on your mother just so she will stop telling you not to put your weapons on the table is really going TOO FAR. Legitimately, Merida's brattiness very nearly caused her mother's death. I liked that Merida so does not need a man to make her happy, she merely needs to be allowed to be herself - but if she could have matured and learned to be herself <em>without</em> turning her mother (and brothers) into a freakin' bear, I might have liked her a little more.<br />
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Best quote:<br />
"Call off the gathering. Would that kill them? You're the queen. You can just tell the lords the princess is not ready for this. In fact, she might not ever be ready for this, so that's that. Good day to you. We'll expect your declarations of war in the morning."<br />
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11. Aurora/Briar Rose (<em>Sleeping Beauty</em>, 1959)<br />
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This one is so not Aurora's fault. If she had spent more than 18 minutes of the movie as an awake 16-year-old, she might have been ranked higher as well. However, she manages to make those 18 minutes count well. Aurora's playfulness is charming, as shown when she teases her aunts and dances with the woodland creatures who are pretending to be her prince. And her wide-eyed shock and shyness when she first meets Philip belie an underlying desire not for a prince necessarily, but for passion and romance, which are things she's never known before. (Side note: it is my firm opinion that Aurora and Philip have the all-time best Disney meet-cute. It had to be said.) The grief, anger, and fear of her true identity as a princess threaten to choke her, as this glimpse of a new life is torn away from her (or so she thinks...since she doesn't realize Philip was a prince and she's actually already betrothed to him anyway!). It's such a shame that after this point, she spends the rest of the movie in a trance, then asleep, and even when she wakes up at the end, does not utter a single word of dialogue. Again, Aurora is a product of her time, and if she had been allowed more than 18 minutes of *awake* screen time, she might have ranked higher on this list.<br />
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Best quote:<br />
"Oh, we walk together, and talk together, and just before we say goodbye, he takes me in his arms, and then...I wake up. *Sigh* Yes, it's only in my dreams. But they say if you dream a thing more than once, it's sure to come true. And I've seen him so many times."<br />
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10. Ariel (<em>The Little Mermaid</em>, 1989)<br />
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I might get some heat for ranking Ariel so low, as she is arguably the most popular Disney princess. I admit I see the appeal. Ariel is the youngest of many sisters, yet she is completely unique. Her huge blue eyes combined with her amazing red hair and skimpy (yet classy!) outfit make her one of the most beautiful Disney princesses, and her spunk and rebellion mark her as the first proactive, rather than reactive, princess. But ultimately, <em>The Little Mermaid</em> suffers from flawed storytelling, and therefore so does Ariel. I get the teen angst and anger at her father that caused her to accept Ursula's incredibly tempting deal - sell your voice, get legs, and become a part of the human world for three days. I love that she made her own choice, which is so not what her predecessors would have done. But I hate the choice she made. She gambled her entire life as a mermaid, her father, her sisters, her friends, her kingdom, on a three-day stay in an entirely new world where she knew no one and could not communicate. This empowering, free-woman choice Ariel makes <em>for herself</em> makes her an absolute feminist icon to some, but to me, it just makes her appear naïve, and not in a good way. (Her naivete also appears to her disadvantage while she is human, as evidenced by her enthusiastic combing of her hair with a fork, and her noticeable failure to employ her ability to write as a means of communication with Eric. Flawed storytelling, seriously.) I like Ariel's spunk, I truly do. And Prince Eric is a total hottie, so I get why she's crushing on him and why she would want to become a human to be with him. But her naivete (which sometimes borders on plain unintelligence) combined with the flaws in her story rank her low on this list.<br />
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Best quote:<br />
"What would I give to live where you are? What would I pay to stay here beside you? What would I do to see you smiling at me? Where would we walk, where would we run, if we could stay all day in the sun? Just you and me, and I could be part of your world."<br />
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9. Elsa the Snow Queen (<em>Frozen</em>, 2013)<br />
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Another choice I'm SURE I'll get flak for, ranking such a newly beloved character this low. Believe me, it was a hard choice to make. And again, it's not particularly Elsa's fault - her character suffers from extremely bad advice from others, plus some serious flawed storytelling. Had Elsa's parents tried to oversee their daughter's gift, offer her some help and support as she learned how to use and control it, she might have never had to shut herself away. Or had she herself reached out, even in fear, to her parents or Anna or anyone, things might have been different. Had she done anything other than hiding in her room for over a decade, she might have been able to enjoy her life. She might have been able to avoid harming her sister. She might have truly blossomed as a princess and then a queen. But instead, she spends her life shut away from everyone, hating herself and living in fear, thinking her powers are evil and bad and she must spend her whole life concealing, not feeling, who she truly is. Had she even attempted to explain to Anna why she was always shutting her out, I probably would have ranked Elsa much higher. <br />
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Best quote:<br />
"The cold never bothered me anyway."<br />
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8. Anna (<em>Frozen</em>, 2013)<br />
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I liked <em>Frozen</em>, really I did, but am I the only one that thinks it's really overrated? Still, I do think that Anna is pretty adorable. She's playful, curious, awkward, speaks before she thinks, and loves her sister more than anything. Yeah, she's given flak for agreeing to marry a man she'd only met hours previously, but she only did that because she was insanely lonely from having been pushed away by her sister her whole life. Ultimately, her love for Elsa saved both sisters from death. I also love that even when Elsa's powers are discovered, Anna remains firm in her belief that her sister is not dangerous or a monster. She sets out to find her sister and try to convince her to return, always believing (accurately) that her sister just needs some help and reassurance. Plus, when Anna wakes up in the morning drooling and with her hair all lumpy and frizzy - as opposed to Cinderella, being awakened by birds and with her hair in perfect cute braids and singing beautifully - well, Anna's kinda legit. She's a very modern Disney princess, yet overall less memorable than many of the others.<br />
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Best quote:<br />
"This is awkward. Not, not <em>you're</em> awkward, just, I'm awkward. You're gorgeous. Wait, what?"<br />
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7. Cinderella (<em>Cinderella</em>, 1950)<br />
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I absolutely LOVE Cinderella, and in fact she's probably my second favorite Disney princess overall. But, as another victim of her time period, she is ranked only as #7. Cinderella is gentle, kind, graceful, and never allows her stepfamily's horrible treatment of her to squash her dreams. Amazing, really, as her stepfamily is literally THE WORST. Cinderella's main fault is that she doesn't really <em>do </em>anything in her movie, short of demonstrating her lovely voice, ability to waltz, and refusal to give up her dreams. Everything just sort of happens <em>to</em> her; use, abuse, fairy godmother saving the day, and her prince (who I absolutely REFUSE to refer to as "Prince Charming," because that is NOT his name) falls in love with her on the spot. Yet she still seems like a real person (something Snow White never achieved) as she is quite witty and even a little bit sassy at times. All she wants in life is happiness and a better life, and she never loses sight of that. The late Ilene Woods' vocal performance as Cinderella is the perfect blend of girlishness, maturity, grace, and a touch of sass, and Cinderella remains just as memorable as ever after more than sixty years.<br />
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Best quote:<br />
"Oh well. What's a royal ball? After all, I suppose it would be frightfully dull, and boring...and completely...completely wonderful."<br />
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6. Jasmine (<em>Aladdin</em>, 1992)<br />
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Jasmine has a unique position among the Disney princesses, as she is the only princess who is less important in her movie than her prince. Still, Jasmine makes her screen time count. She is every bit as spunky as Ariel, and while she is naïve, she is by her own admission a "fast learner." She has her head on straight, knows exactly what she wants, and refuses to live her life on any terms but her own. She is clever, quick-thinking, and completely unafraid to stand up to the men in her life. Jasmine never hesitates to show her complete and utter disdain for Jafar, never puts up with arrogance from her suitors, and is able to not only recognize but <em>vocalize</em> the fact that she "is NOT a prize to be won!" I absolutely love Jasmine's complete confidence in who she is and what she wants and deserves from her life, even if she is a princess and a sheltered one at that. <br />
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Best quote:<br />
"How dare you! All of you! Standing around, deciding <em>my</em> future? I am NOT a prize to be won!"<br />
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5. Pocahontas (<em>Pocahontas</em>, 1995)<br />
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Let's ignore the fact that this movie is rife with historical inaccuracies, and instead focus on Pocahontas as a Disney princess rather than a real-life person. She's beautiful, intelligent, brave, open-minded, able to see past differences, and willing to make any sacrifice in order to do what's right. She doesn't hesitate to stand up to her father, even if it means she might be killed, and she ultimately enables him to look past his own prejudices and make peace with his enemies. What's more, she has the strength to let her love interest do what he needs to do and leave her behind. Plus, she can paint with all the colors of the wind. (It had to be said.)<br />
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Best quote:<br />
"Look around you. This is where the path of hatred has brought us. This is the path I choose, Father. What will yours be?"<br />
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4. Rapunzel (<em>Tangled</em>, 2010)<br />
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Seriously, <em>Tangled</em> is one of the best Disney princess movies out there. The animation is stunning, the story is incredibly entertaining, and the characters (in particular the non-human characters of Pascal and Maximus) are wonderfully developed. Rapunzel emerges as a Disney princess filled with life, spunk, beauty, and a desire to see the "lights" as she calls them, so that she can understand what's missing in her life. Sure, she's sheltered, but her time shut away in her tower has not been wasted, as she is shown to be incredibly talented at baking, sewing, astronomy, and most of all, art. Her determination, even through her fear, to go and see the lights and accomplish her dream, is wonderfully refreshing. And her inner strength and self confidence once she has seen the lights is truly inspiring.<br />
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Best quotes:<br />
<strong>Rapunzel</strong>: I've been looking out of a window for eighteen years, dreaming about what I might feel like when those lights rise in the sky. But what if it's not everything I dreamed it would be?<br />
<strong>Flynn Rider</strong> (possibly the freaking BEST Disney prince EVER, btw): It will be.<br />
<strong>Rapunzel</strong>: And what if it <em>is</em>? What do I do then?<br />
<strong>Flynn Rider</strong>: You get to go find a new dream.<br />
^SUCH PROFUNDITY. PERFECTION.<br />
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<strong>Flynn Rider</strong>: Rapunzel? You were my new dream.<br />
<strong>Rapunzel</strong>: And you were mine.<br />
^I really just can't even handle how romantic and wonderful and <em>perfect</em> this declaration of love is.<br />
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3. Mulan (<em>Mulan</em>, 1998)<br />
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Mulan is so awesome. She tries, truly she does, to do what is expected of her and what she knows will bring her family honor: she gets all gussied up and presents herself to the matchmaker, truly attempting to become a bride. Her heart is SO in the right place. But this really shows when she decides to save her ailing father and go to war against the Huns in his stead. Masquerading as a man, Mulan pushes through army training, becoming super badass along the way, and manages to save not only her father, but her fellow soldiers, captain, the Emperor, and all of China as well. Seriously..this chick ROCKS. Girl power!<br />
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Best quote:<br />
"Just because I look like a man doesn't mean I have to smell like one."<br />
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2. Tiana (<em>The Princess and the Frog</em>, 2009)<br />
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Tiana ranks this highly because she<em> knows</em>. She knows! She is the only Disney princess to have been given the truth by her father: that she can wish on a star all she wants, but in order for her dreams to come true, she has to work hard to achieve what she wants. And this is exactly what she does. Sure, she actually focuses a little too hard on work and forgets how to have fun and really <em>live</em>, but enter her fun-loving prince Naveen, and together they work together and teach each other important lessons. Tiana's head is squarely on her shoulders, and she knows what's up. In fact, she knows what's up so much that she is able to resist Dr. Facilier's temptation to give her everything she thought she wanted in exchange for Naveen's life. What an awesome Disney character.<br />
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Best quote:<br />
"My daddy never did get what he wanted. But he had what he needed. He had love. He never lost sight of what was really important. And neither will I!"<br />
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1. Belle (<em>Beauty and the Beast</em>, 1990)<br />
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Seriously, I just love Belle. She's insanely beautiful, but she doesn't really realize that, and more importantly, she doesn't care at all. She wants knowledge, adventure, a better life, a <em>meaningful</em> life. She doesn't care about beauty, or status, or getting married, or anything like that. And she's able to see past all those things to what's really important. She's brave and self-sacrificing, as shown when she gave herself up for her father, and she's not afraid to tell it like it is, as shown when she and the Beast argue while she bandages his arm. Belle has so many moments that show her quick mind, her store of knowledge, her courage, and her refusal to let a man dictate her life, that I won't list anymore. I'll just tell you to go and watch <em>Beauty and the Beast</em> again. Best. Movie. Ever.<br />
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Best quote:<br />
"I want adventure in the great wide somewhere! I want it more than I can tell! And for once it might be grand to have someone understand - I want so much more than they've got planned..."<br />
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So there you have it. My ranking of the Disney princesses. #theimportantissuesinlife<br />
<br />Kathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07875437304634395430noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7269064068470906619.post-63840917047865739542013-06-03T19:40:00.003-07:002013-06-03T19:40:52.004-07:00I want a feast - I want a bean feast!<em>The Fellowship of the Ring is sidetracked into another strange situation, this being ending up at Willy Wonka's chocolate factory...</em><br />
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<strong>Legolas</strong>: Where the heck are we?<br />
<br />
<strong>Frodo</strong>: Crud! We're cursed!<br />
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<strong>Boromir</strong>: So where are we now?<br />
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<strong>Gandalf</strong>: Wonka something or other.<br />
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<strong>Aragorn</strong>: Is there a door?<br />
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<strong>Boromir</strong>: We're standing in front of it, stupid!<br />
<br />
<strong>Aragorn</strong>: Oh.<br />
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<strong>Merry</strong>: The sign says 'Ring bell and enter.'<br />
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<strong>Gandalf</strong>: There's got to be some catch. You don't just ring a bell and enter. What must we <br />
do? What's the password?<br />
<br />
<strong>Gimli</strong>: This isn't the bloody mines of Moria! Just ring the bell!<br />
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<strong>Pippin</strong>: Duuuuuuuuuuuhhhhh.<br />
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<em>Gandalf rings the bell. The bell plays the tune of 'Pure Imagination.'</em><br />
<strong>Legolas</strong>: Ugh, what a ghastly little tune.<br />
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<em>They wait outside for the door to open for ten minutes.</em><br />
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<strong>Gimli</strong>: Open the bloody door or I'll chop it into sawdust with my axe!<br />
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<em>Willy comes to the door (finally) and opens it a crack to talk to the Fellowship.</em><br />
<strong>Willy</strong>: What do you want?<br />
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<strong>Gandalf</strong>: Hello to you too. It's so nice to hear you've retained your politeness.<br />
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<strong>Willy</strong>: Why should I be polite? That Charlie Bucket kid owns Wonka Industries now. <br />
Unfortunately when I granted that little beast ownership of my enterprise I was high. I bet you never knew wonderful Willy Wonka smoked pot.<br />
<br />
<strong>Gandalf</strong>: No I did not, nor did I ever really have the urge to know.<br />
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<strong>Merry</strong>: Well, that explains your constantly being a nut case.<br />
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<strong>Willy</strong>: I'm afraid that comes naturally.<br />
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<strong>Legolas</strong>: Reeeeeeeeeeeally.<br />
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<strong>Gandalf</strong>: Anyway, would you care to let us in?<br />
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<strong>Merry</strong>: We're cold and hungry here.<br />
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<strong>Pippin</strong>: YES! Excessively hungry!<br />
<br />
<em>There is silence</em>.<br />
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<strong>Sam</strong>: CAN'T YOU HEAR US?????<br />
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<strong>Willy</strong>: Willy hears you. Willy just doesn't care.<br />
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<strong>Frodo</strong>: Let us in! Let us in NOW!<br />
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<strong>Sam</strong>: I've got a frying pan and I know how to use it!<br />
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<em>There is more silence</em>.<br />
<br />
<strong>Gandalf</strong>: Forget that stupid scuzzbag.<br />
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<strong>Legolas</strong>: That hat of his is sooooooo tacky.<br />
<br />
<em>Suddenly, at the word 'tacky,' a frazzled Willy Wonka opens the door and brandishes that annoying cane of his at Legolas.</em><br />
<strong>Willy</strong>: TAKE THAT BACK!!!!!<br />
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<strong>Legolas</strong>: Well, it <em>is</em> tacky.<br />
<br />
<strong>Willy</strong>: YOU put it on then! Go on!<br />
<br />
<em>Legolas reluctantly puts on the hat.</em><br />
<strong>Aragorn</strong>: Wow. That actually looks good!<br />
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<strong>Boromir</strong>: Yeah. What's your trick, elf boy, in making tacky things look good?<br />
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<strong>Legolas</strong>: Anything looks good on beautiful people.<br />
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<strong>Gimli</strong>: Pppphhhhttttt.<br />
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<strong>Willy</strong>: You might as well all come in now. It's not like the candy's going anywhere soon. Charlie has a whole giant store of it. He's taken over the chocolate room. He's even considered shipping the Oompa-Loompas back to the land of Vermicious Knids, but I threatened to expose the fizzy lifting drinks "episode" to the public.<br />
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<strong>Merry</strong>: I thought you said he wouldn't notice, Pip!<br />
<br />
<strong>Willy</strong>: Notice what?<br />
<br />
<strong>Pippin</strong>: Nothing, nothing.<br />
<br />
<strong>Sam</strong>: Can we please come in now, Mr. Wonka?<br />
<br />
<strong>Willy</strong>: Yeah, sure. Just walk through the door. You'll see some freaky stuff, and when you get to another door, just wait there and I'll let you into the chocolate room, for that is why you have come, is it not?<br />
<br />
<strong>Gandalf</strong>: No, we--<br />
<br />
<strong>Pippin</strong>: Of course! A chocolate room! How grand!<br />
<br />
<strong>Merry</strong>: Just spiffy.<br />
<br />
<strong>Frodo</strong>: I wonder what we've gotten ourselves into now.<br />
<br />
<em>So the Fellowship goes through the door, sees some freaky stuff, and gets to the other door, which is the door to the chocolate room.</em><br />
<strong>Willy</strong>: Check out the wallpaper. It tastes like fruit! I think you can get high off it, though.<br />
<br />
<strong>Gandalf</strong>: Ooooooo!<br />
<br />
<em>Pippin starts madly licking the wall.</em><br />
<strong>Pippin</strong>: Wow, this is good! It's like a rush! I'm going to lick wallpaper more often now!<br />
<br />
<strong>Merry</strong>: Hey! Stop licking all the taste off the wall! Save some for me!<br />
<br />
<strong>Frodo</strong>: Why? Why did I take them? Why did I take wallpaper lickers with me?!<br />
<br />
<strong>Legolas</strong>: So, about this chocolate room...<br />
<br />
<strong>Willy</strong>: Ah yes! The chocolate room! Well, it's a...a...a...chocolate room...and, uh...yeah.<br />
<br />
<strong>Boromir</strong>: So let us in!<br />
<br />
<strong>Willy</strong>: Yeah, I just always sing this song before I go in and--<br />
<br />
<strong>Pippin</strong>: Cut the crap and bring on the chocolate!<br />
<br />
<strong>Aragorn</strong>: I think I just tasted radishes on this wallpaper.<br />
<br />
<strong>Willy</strong>: Oh, that's just your pure imagination. Which reminds me of a song!<br />
<br />
<strong>Legolas</strong>: No!!!!!!<br />
<br />
<strong>Gandalf</strong>: Oh please don't.<br />
<br />
<strong>Willy</strong> (<em>singing</em>): There is no life I know to compaaaaaaare with--<br />
<br />
<strong>Pippin</strong>: --pure exasperation.<br />
<br />
<strong>Willy</strong>: HEY! You ruined my song!<br />
<br />
<strong>Merry</strong>: So?<br />
<br />
<strong>Pippin</strong>: And your point is?<br />
<br />
<strong>Willy</strong>: When people interrupt my songs, Master Pippin, they don't EVER come back, nor do they ever leave for that matter.<br />
<br />
<strong>Sam</strong>: You've got some major issues there, buddy.<br />
<br />
<strong>Frodo</strong>: Can we go? The Wonka dude is freaking me out!<br />
<br />
<strong>Willy</strong>: Do I scare you? Do I really make you afraid?<br />
<br />
<strong>Aragorn</strong> <em>(thinking</em>)<thinks>: Yep, you do.<br /><br /><strong>Willy</strong>: Do you want to see the chocolate room or not?<br /><br /><strong>Pippin</strong>: Yes! Yes! Open the door!<br /><br /><em>Willy opens the door. He is about to burst out into song, but Merry and Pippin barge past him and knock him to the ground. Everyone looks around the chocolate room in wonder.</em><br /><strong>Pippin</strong>: Woohoo! It's paradise! Food everywhere!<br /><br /><strong>Frodo</strong>: It's a chocolate Rivendell!<br /><br /><strong>Legolas</strong>: Mmm! Sugar!<br /><br /><strong>Merry</strong>: Wow. A chocolate river!<br /><br /><em>Pippin, who's beyond ravenous, devours more than his body weight in chocolate and candy.</em><strong>Willy</strong>: Good grief man! What is his problem?<br /><br /><strong>Gandalf</strong>: 'Tis no man. 'Tis a remorseless eating machine!<br /><br /><strong>Pippin</strong> (<em>with a mouthful of M&M's</em>): I'm a hobbit, actually.<br /><br /><em>After a while, the Oompa-Loompas appear</em>.<br /><br /><strong>Oompa-Loompas</strong>: Oompa-Loompa, doompa dee doo, I've got another puzzle for you...<br /><br /><strong>Aragorn</strong>: Sorry, I'm not in the mood for puzzles.<br /><br /><strong>Oompa-Loompas</strong>: But we've got a puzzle for you!<br /><br /><strong>Aragorn</strong>: No thanks, that's quite all right.<br /><br /><em>Everyone just hangs out in the chocolate room for an hour. Merry steals away and finds the fizzy lifting drinks. He distributes them to the three other hobbits. Suddenly there are 4 hobbits floating in the air.</em><br /><strong>Pippin</strong>: Yeah!!!! I can fly!!!!!<br /><br /><strong>Merry</strong>: I think I'm getting gas from this stuff.<br /><br /><strong>Sam</strong>: Of course you are. It's fizzy lifting drinks, not flat lifting drinks.<br /><br /><strong>Merry</strong>: Hey! We're "Monty Python's Flying Hobbits!"<br /><br /><strong>Pippin</strong>: Yeah! Go us!<br /><br /><strong>Frodo</strong>: Wow, you can see the bald spot on Boromir's head from up here!<br /><br /><strong>Sam</strong>: Are you serious? Let me see!<br /><br /><strong>Willy</strong>: This is so tedious! You're not at all like these kids that came in here earlier. One kid jumped in the chocolate river, one of them ate this messed-up gum I made and turned into a blueberry! That Charlie kid and his grandfather stole the fizzy lifting drinks--wait a second! Why are the hobbits in the air?<br /><br /><strong>Pippin</strong> <em>(from the ceiling</em>): Whoohoo! I can fly! So, what's in this stuff?</thinks><br />
<thinks><br /><strong>Willy</strong>: Oh, ginger ale, ginger pop, ginger beer, beer bubbles, bubble-ade, bubble cola, double cola, double-bubble-burp-a-cola and all those other little carbonated things that tickle your nose. Few people realize what tremendous power there is in some of those things.<br /><br /><strong>Pippin</strong> (<em>to the other hobbits</em>): Sorry I asked.<br /><br /><strong>Sam</strong>: Great, how do we get down from here?<br /><br /><strong>Merry</strong>: Yeah, I'm starting to get hives from being up so high.<br /><br /><strong>Frodo</strong>: Hives?<br /><br /><strong>Merry</strong>: Yeah, it has to do with that whole "fear of heights" thing, ya know?<br /><br /><strong>Frodo</strong>: Oh right, right.<br /><br /><strong>Gandalf</strong>: We should be going now.<br /><br /><strong>Pippin</strong>: But how do we get down?<br /><br /><strong>Gandalf</strong>: Just burp, you fools!<br /><br /><strong>Pippin</strong>: Ooooooooh, okay.<br /><br /><em>So all the hobbits burp. They float down. And now they are facing a very angry and very paranoid Willy Wonka.</em><br /><br /><strong>Willy</strong>: Why'd you have to take the fizzy lifting drinks?? WHY???<br /><br /><strong>Pippin</strong>: Because...because...we felt like it?<br /><br /><strong>Merry</strong>: How come we always attract evil, Pip?<br /><br /><strong>Pippin</strong>: No idea, but I'm sure it doesn't have anything to do with me.<br /><br /><strong>Gandalf</strong>: Whatever. We've got to go now.<br /><br /><strong>Willy</strong>: YES! Leave now or I'll set my Oompa-Loompas on you! They're already mad because you wouldn't let them tell you a puzzle.<br /><br /><strong>Everyone</strong>: Yeah, let's go now.<br /><br /><strong>Willy</strong>: Go! Wonka is mine! All mine! MINE! My precioussssssssss...<br /><br /><strong>Frodo</strong>: Whooooooooooooaa....<br /><br /><strong>Sam</strong>: Okay, time to leave<br /><br /><em>So they leave. And as they do, they can hear Willy's crazy cries coming from the chocolate room.</em><br /><br /><strong>Legolas</strong>: Whoa, that guy is cracked, man.<br /><br /><strong>Gandalf</strong>: I think he cracked long ago.<br /><br /><strong>Boromir</strong>: Say 'crack' again.<br /><br /><strong>Legolas</strong>: Crack.<br /><br /><em>The fellowship is just about to leave the factory when they suddenly see Willy standing in front of the door out.</em><br /><strong>Gandalf</strong>: I thought you were wallowing in your chocolate.<br /><br /><strong>Willy</strong>: Well, Mithrandir, I've changed my mind and I've decided to keep you all here for a while. I think a tour of my chocolate factory would do you all good.<br /><br /><strong>Frodo</strong>: What if--<br /><br /><strong>Willy</strong>: Shhh!<br /><br /><strong>Frodo</strong>: But--<br /><br /><strong>Willy</strong>: If ifs and buts were candy and nuts then we'd all have a merry Christmas.<br /><br /><strong>Frodo</strong>: Whatever.<br /><br /><strong>Willy</strong>: So, come along and see the rest of my factory.<br /><br /><strong>Gandalf</strong> (<em>to Aragorn</em>): It never ends, does it?<br /><br /><strong>Aragorn</strong>: No, it seems it doesn't. I really hope that when they write a book about our <br />quest, they leave this part out!<br /><br /><em>Reluctantly, the Fellowship follows Willy back into the chocolate room again. Merry and Sam have to physically restrain Pippin from eating his heart out again.</em><br /><strong>Pippin</strong>: You can't do this to me! You just can't!<br /><br /><strong>Merry</strong>: Just chill.<br /><br /><strong>Sam</strong>: You've already had pints and pints of chocolate from the chocolate river!<br /><br /><strong>Pippin</strong>: It comes in pints?!?!?!<br /><br /><strong>Everyone</strong> (<em>thinking to themselves</em>): Must get away!<br /><br /><strong>Willy</strong>: Okay! Less chocolate, more me! Let's get along now. There's my boat, I wondered where it was. Shall we?<br /><br /><strong>Aragorn</strong>: Shall we what?<br /><br /><strong>Willy</strong>: Let's go! You've got to see my other freaky things.<br /><br /><strong>Aragorn</strong> <sighs>: Why not?<br /><br /><strong>Willy</strong>: Good. So let's all get on the boat. NOW!<br /><br /><strong>Gimli</strong>: I've never seen anything like this.<br /><br /><strong>Pippin</strong>: Well, it all fits in with Wonka's freakiness.<br /><br /><em>So everyone boards the boat. Willy's ego starts to rise and he begins to sing, but is interrupted by Pippin.</em><br /><strong>Willy</strong>: There is no life I know to--<br /><br /><strong>Pippin</strong>: So what else is there to see in this mad house?<br /><br /><strong>Willy</strong> (<em>grinding his teeth</em>): You'll see, Master Pippin. Now, if you'll just let me sing...<br /><br /><strong>Legolas</strong>: No! Don't sing! Please don't sing! I'm begging you!<br /><br /><strong>Willy</strong>: Well, excuse me! I just have a need to sing constantly!<br /><br /><strong>Pippin</strong>: Yeah! There's a name for that. It's obsessive-compulsive.<br /><br /><strong>Willy</strong>: Well, we're entering the excessively un-scary tunnel of doom right now. I think I <br />need to start singing my excessively wacked-out sing right now. There's no earthly way of knowing, which--<br /><br /><strong>Pippin</strong>: Oooh, I have a better song! There are chickens in the treeeeees...there are <br />chickens in the treeeeeeeeees...won't you count them if you pleeeeeeeeeeeease? There are chickens in the treeeeeeeees!<br /><br /><strong>Legolas</strong>: Oh my.<br /><br /><strong>Frodo</strong>: This is worse than the wallpaper!<br /><br />Willy: Oooookay! Let's listen to my song now. There's no earthly way of knowing, which--<br /><br /><strong>Merry</strong>: How about an encore of "There are Chickens in the Trees"?<br /><br /><strong>Sam</strong>: Anything's better than Mr. Wonka's singing. (<em>shivers)</em></sighs><br />
<sighs><br /><em>So Pippin sings "There are Chickens in the Trees" ten times until they are at a door to Wonka's inventing room, or whatever you call it.</em><br /><br /><strong>Willy</strong>: Here is my most prized possession: the everlasting Gobstopper!<br /><br /><em>Pippin picks up a Gobstopper and sucks the life out of it in 30 seconds flat.</em><br /><br /><strong>Pippin</strong>: I wouldn't call that everlasting, Mr. Wonka. Are you running a scam?<br /><br /><em>Willy clenches his teeth and compulsively runs his hands through his untidy brown hair. He then proceeds to yank most of it out.</em><br /><strong>Willy</strong>: Master Pippin, you'd do well to leave things alone!<br /><br /><strong>Pippin</strong>: Well, it isn't everlasting.<br /><br /><strong>Merry</strong>: He speaks the truth, man!<br /><br /><strong>Willy</strong>: You blasted halflings! You've ruined my day! You're bringing down my self-esteem!<br /><br /><strong>Merry</strong>: Hoo yeah! It's being deflated like a balloon!<br /><br /><strong>Pippin</strong>: As it should be.<br /><br /><em>All the hobbits nod vigorously at Pippin's words.</em><br /><br /><strong>Willy</strong>: Shall we look at my other creations? Yes, I think we shall. Come along now.<br /><br /><em>Everyone follows Willy into the golden egg room</em>.<br /><br /><strong>Willy</strong>: These are my geese. They lay golden eggs. I named one Priscilla.<br /><br /><strong>Legolas</strong>: That's great.<br /><br /><strong>Willy</strong>: Someone always falls down the egg shoot. I have no idea why, though.<br /><br /><strong>Gandalf</strong>: Maybe it's because of lack of a sign that says, "CAUTION! DO NOT SIT DOWN! YOU ARE MOST LIKELY A BAD EGG IF YOU SIT HERE! SO STEER CLEAR!"<br /><br /><strong>Boromir</strong> (<em>to Legolas</em>): I'm not sure he wants to put up a sign.<br /><br /><strong>Legolas</strong>: I think he very well enjoys watching people being sucked down a chute. I mean, this is Wonka!<br /><br /><strong>Willy</strong>: Shall we go see my awesome fizz car that runs on soda fizz?<br /><br /><strong>Aragorn</strong>: Forgive me for not leaping for joy.<br /><br /><em>They all go into the room with the Fizz Car in it.</em><br /><br /><strong>Willy</strong>: Behold! My awesome fizz car!<br /><br /><strong>Legolas</strong>: You have a lot of time on your hands, don't you?<br /><br /><strong>Gandalf</strong>: Now that's just scary.<br /><br /><strong>Aragorn</strong>: Oooh, I have a good idea!<br /><br /><strong>Boromir</strong>: What is it, then?<br /><br /><strong>Aragorn</strong>: Okay, we steal the Fizz car and bust ourselves out of here! There are no words to <br />describe the ultimate scariness of this place.<br /><br /><strong>Legolas</strong>: Good idea. All in favor say aye!<br /><br /><strong>The Fellowship</strong>: Aye!<br /><br /><strong>Gandalf</strong>: It's settled then. Someone get on Willy's back when the fizz starts spewing <br />everywhere and knock him off. Legolas can take over the controls.<br /><br /><em>Willy climbs onto the Fizz Car and starts it up. </em><br /><strong>Willy</strong>: Hum diddly dum doo laaaaaaaaa deeeeeeeeeeeee daaaaaaaaaaaaa--AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!<br /><br /><em>Merry and Pippin knock Willy off. Legolas whips Willy's top hat hoff his head and puts it on his own. So there's this elf in a purple top hat driving the Fizz car...while singing.</em><br /><strong>Legolas</strong>: War! Ho! Good grief man! What is it good for? Absolutely nothin', say it again, <br />I say war, ho...<br /><br /><em>The Fellowship is soon bolting out of Wonka's chocolate factory while being pursued by angry Oompa-Loompas. Legolas is looking insane with a manic smile on his face with the purple top hat on his head. He's cussing at the Oompa-Loompas without mercy.</em><br /><strong>Legolas</strong>: YEAH! You'd better run! Before I knock you over with this messed-up car of mine! HAHAHAHA! You can't catch me I'm the ELF MAN! MWAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!<br /><br /><strong>Gimli</strong>: Are you all right, Legolas?<br /><br /><strong>Legolas</strong>: I'm great! Never been better!<br /><br /><strong>Frodo</strong>: Wow, this is a side of Legolas we never see!<br /><br /><strong>Legolas</strong>: Take a picture, Frodo my halfling friend, 'cause you ain't gonna be seeing it again anytime soon.<br /><br /><strong>Sam</strong>: I feel so priviliged.<br /><br /><strong>Pippin</strong>: YEAH! Go Legolas!<br /><br /><strong>Merry</strong>: WHOOOOOOOO!!!!<br /><br /><strong>Frodo</strong>: Well, this stinks. Wonka is coming after us in his glass elevator!<br /><br /><em>The Fellowship looks up and sees the faint outline of a glass elevator, along with the faint cackle of frenzied laughter.</em><br /><strong>Willy</strong> (<em>distantly</em>): You stole my Fizz car! Curse you! Curse you!Cursesssssssss... (<em>cackles</em>)<br /><br /><strong>Pippin</strong>: I'm thinking the Wicked Witch of the West!<br /><br /><strong>Merry</strong>: Yeah! Maybe he has green skin under the purple suit!<br /><br /><strong>Legolas</strong> (<em>shouting to Wonka</em>): Hey, where're your flying monkeys, Wonka? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!<br /><br /><strong>Boromir</strong>: Oooh, I'd pay big money to see a house dropped on him!<br /><br /><strong>Pippin</strong>: Oy! Gandalf! Where're we off to next?<br /><br /><strong>Gandalf</strong>: I don't know. I expect somewhere weird again. Who knows?<br /><br /><strong>Pippin</strong>: I have to pee.<br /><br /><strong>Merry</strong>: Go you.<br /><br /><strong>Pippin</strong>: No, really.<br /><br /><em>The scene fades with Merry and Pippin arguing in the background.</em><br />
<br />
<br />
(I SO wish I knew who wrote this or where it came from...all I know is that my friend Jenna Hotz showed it to me when I was in ninth grade. And I still think it's every bit as lame and every bit as hilarious now as I did then. LOTR nerd in every way!!!)</sighs></thinks>Kathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07875437304634395430noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7269064068470906619.post-56056241631494787832013-06-01T18:52:00.001-07:002013-06-01T18:54:53.182-07:00the fullness of Christ is my treasureWow. I can't believe it's June 1! It hasn't even been two whole weeks yet since BSF ended, and already so much has happened. One thing we've been talking about for the last few weeks of BSF was how we were going to stay in God's Word over the summer. My dad came up with a really neat idea that I have also adopted: we are writing out, by hand, various books of the Bible in notebooks. My dad is doing the entire book of Romans, which is an incredibly arduous task! I decided to start with something a little less intimidating, and today I finished writing out the book of Ephesians (I am continuing with the book of Colossians, but that's another post!). The last part of Ephesians, which is chapter 6, talks about the armor of God. I can never remember exactly what any of the armor means or how to use it, so I thought I would write the definitions here. My former youth pastor, Keith Mason, preached a sermon on the armor of God in 2011 and here are the notes I wrote down on the different pieces of armor.<br />
<br />
<br />
<ul>
<li><strong><em><u>"Stand firm, then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist..."</u></em></strong></li>
</ul>
<em><u></u></em><br />
Remind ourselves that in coming to Christ, we have found all truth. Satan is the father of lies, but we believe the truth found in Christ. Colossians 2:3 "...Christ, in whom are hidden all the treasures of wisdom and knowledge." John 14:6 "Jesus said, 'I am the Way, the <strong>Truth</strong>, and the Life. No one comes to the Father except through me.'" <br />
<br />
<ul>
<li><strong><em><u>"...with the breastplate of righteousness in place..."</u></em></strong></li>
</ul>
When we fail, we try to hide it in our own righteousness. But we have no merit apart fom Christ. By <em>God's</em> righteousness, <em>Christ's</em> righteousness, we can withstand the lies and guilt of the enemy. Romans 3:21 "But now apart from the law the righteousness of God has been made known, to which the Law and the Prophets testify." Romans 8:1-2 "Therefore there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit who gives life has set you free from the law of sin and death."<br />
<br />
<ul>
<li><strong><em><u>"...and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace."</u></em></strong></li>
</ul>
The gospel of Christ's death, resurrection, and salvation brings us peace. The gospel of peace gives us a whole new way to view our struggles and suffering. Romans 8:18 "I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us." Romans 5:1 "Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ" John 16:33 "I have told you these things so that in Me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble - but take heart! I have overcome the world."<br />
<br />
<ul>
<li><strong><em><u>"In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one."</u></em></strong></li>
</ul>
Acting on our beliefs in our everyday life - we can and should use the shield in every specific situation. This is how we extinguish the flaming arrows of the enemy. Psalm 7:10 "God is my shield, saving those whose hearts are true and right." 1 Peter 1:4b-5 "This inheritance is kept in heaven for you, who in faith are shielded by God's power until the coming of the salvation that is ready to be revealed in the last time."<br />
<br />
<ul>
<li><strong><em><u>"Take the helmet of salvation..."</u></em></strong></li>
</ul>
We are saved in hope. Recognize that Christ is working out His plan, He's coming again and will gain a final victory. Romans 8:22-24 "We know that the whole creation has been groaning as in the pains of childbirth right up to the present time. Not only so, but we ourselves, who have the firstfruits of the Spirit, groan inwardly as we await for our adoption to sonship, the redemption of our bodies. For in this hope we were saved." 2 Corinthians 4:16-18 "Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, and what is unseen is eternal." <br />
<br />
<ul>
<li><strong><em><u>"...and the sword of the Spirit, which is the Word of God."</u></em></strong></li>
</ul>
Clearly, this is God's Word - though it is not to be used by itself, but <em>after</em> we have truth, Christ's righteousness, hope, peace, salvation, and faith. Arguably the best way to use this weapon is by memorizing Scripture. Psalm 119:11 "I have hidden Your Word in my heart, that I might not sin against You." <br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
A few final verses about the armor of God:<br />
<br />
"<span class="text Isa-59-15">The <span class="small-caps" style="font-variant: small-caps;">Lord</span> looked and was displeased </span><span class="indent-1"><span class="text Isa-59-15">that there was no justice. </span></span><span class="text Isa-59-16" id="en-NIV-18817">He saw that there was no one, </span><span class="indent-1"><span class="text Isa-59-16">he was appalled that there was no one to intervene; </span></span><span class="text Isa-59-16">so his own arm achieved salvation<sup class="crossreference" value="(<a href="#cen-NIV-18817AP" title="See cross-reference AP">AP</a>)"></sup> for him, </span><span class="indent-1"><span class="text Isa-59-16">and his own righteousness<sup class="crossreference" value="(<a href="#cen-NIV-18817AQ" title="See cross-reference AQ">AQ</a>)"></sup> sustained him. </span></span><span class="text Isa-59-17" id="en-NIV-18818">He put on righteousness as his breastplate, </span><span class="indent-1"><span class="text Isa-59-17">and the helmet<sup class="crossreference" value="(<a href="#cen-NIV-18818AS" title="See cross-reference AS">AS</a>)"></sup> of salvation on his head; </span></span><span class="text Isa-59-17">he put on the garments<sup class="crossreference" value="(<a href="#cen-NIV-18818AT" title="See cross-reference AT">AT</a>)"></sup> of vengeance </span><span class="indent-1"><span class="text Isa-59-17">and wrapped himself in zeal<sup class="crossreference" value="(<a href="#cen-NIV-18818AV" title="See cross-reference AV">AV</a>)"></sup> as in a cloak." ~Isaiah 59:16-17</span></span><br />
<span class="indent-1"><span class="text Isa-59-17"></span></span><br />
<span class="indent-1"><span class="text Isa-59-17">"<span class="text Col-2-13" id="en-NIV-29508">When you were dead in your sins<sup class="crossreference" value="(<a href="#cen-NIV-29508X" title="See cross-reference X">X</a>)"></sup> and in the uncircumcision of your flesh, God made you<sup> </sup>alive<sup class="crossreference" value="(<a href="#cen-NIV-29508Y" title="See cross-reference Y">Y</a>)"></sup> with Christ. He forgave us all our sins, </span><span class="text Col-2-14" id="en-NIV-29509"><sup class="versenum"> </sup>having canceled the charge of our legal indebtedness,<sup class="crossreference" value="(<a href="#cen-NIV-29509AA" title="See cross-reference AA">AA</a>)"></sup> which stood against us and condemned us; he has taken it away, nailing it to the cross." ~Colossians 2:13-14</span></span></span><br />
<span class="indent-1"><span class="text Isa-59-17"><span class="text Col-2-14"></span></span></span><br />
<span class="indent-1"><span class="text Isa-59-17"><span class="text Col-2-14">"Everyone has heard<sup class="crossreference" value="(<a href="#cen-NIV-28356AC" title="See cross-reference AC">AC</a>)"></sup> about your obedience, so I rejoice because of you; but I want you to be wise about what is good, and innocent about what is evil.<sup class="crossreference" value="(<a href="#cen-NIV-28356AD" title="See cross-reference AD">AD</a>)"></sup> <span class="text Rom-16-20" id="en-NIV-28357">The God of peace<sup class="crossreference" value="(<a href="#cen-NIV-28357AE" title="See cross-reference AE">AE</a>)"></sup> will soon crush<sup class="crossreference" value="(<a href="#cen-NIV-28357AF" title="See cross-reference AF">AF</a>)"></sup> Satan<sup class="crossreference" value="(<a href="#cen-NIV-28357AG" title="See cross-reference AG">AG</a>)"></sup> under your feet." ~Romans 16:19-20</span></span></span></span><br />
<span class="indent-1"><span class="text Isa-59-17"><span class="text Col-2-14"><span class="text Rom-16-20"></span></span></span></span><br />
<span class="indent-1"><span class="text Isa-59-17"><span class="text Col-2-14"><span class="text Rom-16-20">"And they sang a new song, saying:<sup class="crossreference" value="(<a href="#cen-NIV-30789R" title="See cross-reference R">R</a>)"></sup></span></span></span></span><br />
<div class="poetry top-05">
<div class="line">
<span class="text Rev-5-9">“You are worthy<sup class="crossreference" value="(<a href="#cen-NIV-30789S" title="See cross-reference S">S</a>)"></sup> to take the scroll</span><br />
<span class="indent-1"><span class="indent-1-breaks"> </span><span class="text Rev-5-9">and to open its seals,</span></span><br />
<span class="text Rev-5-9">because you were slain,</span><br />
<span class="indent-1"><span class="indent-1-breaks"> </span><span class="text Rev-5-9">and with your blood<sup class="crossreference" value="(<a href="#cen-NIV-30789T" title="See cross-reference T">T</a>)"></sup> you purchased<sup class="crossreference" value="(<a href="#cen-NIV-30789U" title="See cross-reference U">U</a>)"></sup> for God</span></span><br />
<span class="indent-1"><span class="indent-1-breaks"> </span><span class="text Rev-5-9">persons from every tribe and language and people and nation." ~Revelation 5:9</span></span></div>
<span class="indent-1"><span class="text Rev-5-9"></span></span><br /></div>
<div class="poetry top-05">
<span class="indent-1"><span class="text Rev-5-9"><sup class="crossreference" value="(<a href="#cen-NIV-30789V" title="See cross-reference V">V</a>)"></sup></span></span><br />
<div class="line">
<br />
I highly recommend this idea of writing out books of the Bible by hand! It's really been great. I've finished Ephesians, have begun Colossians, and will probably move on to Philippians next. It's really a great way to stay in the Word!</div>
</div>
Kathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07875437304634395430noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7269064068470906619.post-23635054659765336112013-04-19T21:15:00.004-07:002013-04-19T21:15:49.738-07:00hey baby, I think I wanna marry you"Staying home alone on a Friday<br />
Flat on the floor, looking back<br />
On old love<br />
Or lack thereof<br />
After all the crushes are faded<br />
And all my wishful thinking was wrong<br />
I'm jaded<br />
I hate it."<br />
<br />
Thank you, John Mayer, for summing up my feelings right about now.<br />
<br />
I am single. I am so single it's unreal. And to be honest, I'm so tired of it I could scream. I <em>have</em> screamed. I have cried, wept, prayed, pushed it to the back of my mind, smiled, threw myself into my work, laughed, been filled with joy in my God and my ministry and my family and my friends and my life, remembered my singleness, screamed, cried, wept, prayed, and repeated this cycle over and over so many times I can't even count them anymore. <br />
<br />
I don't understand.<br />
<br />
I don't understand why I must want to not be single <em>so badly</em>, if I have to spend my whole life single.<br />
<br />
I don't understand why no one has <em>ever</em> wanted me. Or why no one has ever wanted me enough to pursue me.<br />
<br />
I don't understand why I've come so <em>very</em> close before, so close I could almost taste what being in a relationship was like - only to have it come to nothing, <em>again.</em> <br />
<br />
I don't understand why I'm twenty-four years old, have never had a boyfriend, have never been on a date, and see absolutely no end to this in sight.<br />
<br />
I don't understand why, as my life has been that way, the one thing I've wanted ever since I can remember is to be with someone. To be married, and have children. Or at the <em>very</em> least, to be granted the chance to realize that that's <em>not</em> what I want. <br />
<br />
Okay, seriously...this isn't what I came to my blog to post. Sorry about the pity party, I've just been thinking about this whole topic and I couldn't help vomiting some of my frustrations out here. Okay. Get it together, man. GET IT TOGETHER. GAAAHHHH.<br />
<br />
So for reals, I wanted to discuss what I need to be doing in the meantime, while I'm in this <em>endless</em> period of waiting, and waiting, and <em>waiting</em>...sorry! Anyway, a few of my friends have been posting blogs on facebook about finding a godly husband. And while it's extremely important to know what a godly husband should be like and how to find one, really, those posts aren't for many girls right now. Those posts certainly aren't for me at the moment. I'm not dating anyone - I don't even have that many guy friends at all right now. I'm not considering any actual person for a relationship. Those godly husband posts will be for me at a much further point down the road.<br />
<br />
What I need right now is to focus on how to become a godly wife, rather than worry about choosing a godly husband. If I am not currently making the choice to pursue marriage with any man, why should I worry about what he is like? I need to instead focus on making myself into the wife I would want my husband to have. After all - "An excellent wife who can find? She is far more precious than jewels." (Proverbs 31:10) <br />
<br />
<ul>
<li>She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life.</li>
<li>She dresses herself with strength, and makes her arms strong.</li>
<li>She opens her hands to the poor, and reaches out her hand to the needy.</li>
<li>Strength and dignity are her clothing, and she laughs at the time to come.</li>
<li>She opens her mouth with wisdom, and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue.</li>
<li>Her children rise up and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her.</li>
</ul>
What man would not want to marry a woman like this? What woman would not want her husband and her family to perceive her in this way?<br />
<br />
<em>How can I become such a woman?</em><br />
<br />
(Thank you, BSF lectures, for helping me with this!)<br />
<br />
--<strong>Depend on God in prayer</strong> (from Genesis 25:19-34)<br />
Isaac had inherited God's promise of descendents to Abraham, but Rebekah was barren. Isaac didn't try to "help" God along, as Abraham did when he agreed to sleep with Hagar - Isaac went straight to God. <em>Even when God gives us a promise, He still wants us to come to Him and <u>ask</u> Him for it.</em> <br />
Matthew 7:11 "how much more will your Father who is in heaven give good things to those who ask!" Philippians 4:14 "And my God will supply every need of yours according to His riches in glory in Christ Jesus." Isaiah 41:10 "And the Lord will guide you continually and satisfy your desires in scorched places and make your bones strong; and you will be like a watered garden, like a spring of water, whose waters do not fail." <br />
<em>What promise of God do I need to ask Him to fulfill? How will I ask him? When?</em><br />
<br />
--<strong>God's providential plans cannot be earned, changed or lost by our efforts</strong> (from Genesis 25:19-34)<br />
God had<em> promised</em> Isaac and Rebekah children, and they believed enough to ask repeatedly in faith for Him to fulfill that promise.<br />
<em>Our circumstances don't necessarily <u>make</u> us who we are, they<u> reveal</u> who we are.</em><br />
Being single <em><u>makes</u></em> me angry, and depressed, and lonely. Being single <em><u>reveals</u></em> that I am seeking elsewhere than God to satisfy my heart, and that I need to learn to love Him and submit to Him completely whole-heartedly.<br />
<em>God's love is never partial or performance-based.</em><br />
When Esau came to Jacob famished and seeking food, he could have gotten other food easily rather than sell his birthright. On the other hand, Jacob could have cared for Esau and shown him hospitality and kindess, rather than trying to greedily hurry God's promise along that he would get the birthright. Jacob loved the right things - God's promised blessing - but in the wrong way. Esau loved the wrong things altogether - and there is no right way to love the wrong things.<br />
<em>God's gifts are personally handed out, not tossed up for grabs.</em> <br />
When and how am I tempted to use a worldly way to get what I want, even if it's a promise God has made me?<br />
<em>Are my hands gracious, or grabby like Jacob's? Does my life offer praise or demands from God?</em> Jesus freely shares His own spiritual inheritance...how can I be so selfish and greedy as to grab it from His hand before the time is right?<br />
<br />
--<strong>God's discipline is intended to be transformational</strong> (from Genesis 29-31)<br />
When Jacob met Rachel, all he noticed was her physical beauty. He didn't ask God if she was "the one," nor did he discern anything about her character, completely unlike Abraham's servant who was sent to search for a wife for Isaac. The servant put his faith in God and prayerfully considered Rebekah's character. And when Leah and Rachel were both married to Jacob, Rachel never humbly asked <em>God</em> for children - she demanded that Jacob give her children and Leah give her mandrakes. <em>God wants us to change, to make decisions that glorify Him.</em><br />
<em>How must I change? How do I respond to God when new people and new relationships come into my life? In what ways can I use those relationships to make God's name known? To bring Him glory?</em><br />
<br />
What do I want, and how am I trying to get it?? <br />
<br />
How can I become more like a godly wife, while I wait here, single, with no end in sight?Kathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07875437304634395430noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7269064068470906619.post-41912411732663571372013-03-20T14:27:00.001-07:002013-03-20T14:27:37.509-07:00maybe this time I'll winI'm so happy with something I've just noticed. I noticed on facebook that I could see posts on my timeline all the way back to 2006, when I first joined facebook! Aside from some crazy, crazy memories (some good, some I'll just be leaving alone...), I noticed a huge change in my attitude toward school. Allow me to expand on that...<br />
<br />
October 4, 2008<br />
<strong>Katherine Moser</strong> <span class="userContent">is wondering what's worse than throwing up at 5:30am, in a community bathroom, with Beyonce playing in the background...cause all that just happened to her!!!</span><br />
<span class="userContent">^the dorms...*shudder*</span><br />
<span class="userContent"></span><br />
<span class="userContent">October 5, 2008</span><br />
<span class="userContent"><span class="userContent">seriously, I'm going to bed now...don't wake me up till Thanksgiving.</span></span><br />
<br />
October 8, 2008<br />
<span class="userContent">has a headache just thinking about the rest of the semester...stupid Culture Card, THEA and recital credits.</span><br />
<span class="userContent"></span><br />
<span class="userContent">October 16, 2008</span><br />
<span class="userContent"><span class="userContent">can't wait for the showcase to be over so she can go home!!! this weekend's gonna be great!!!</span></span><br />
<span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"></span></span><br />
<span class="userContent"><span class="userContent">October 21, 2008</span></span><br />
<span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent">has a theory test, two lessons, Aural Skills and flute choir to survive...gaaahhhh I HATE SCHOOL!!!!!!</span></span></span><br />
<span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"></span></span></span><br />
<span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent">November 8, 2009</span></span></span><br />
<span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"> wish I could be friends with Taylor Swift. I wish I could hang out with Karie, Ben, Chris and Lizzie. I wish I could go to sleep and not wake up until Christmas break. I am so much enjoying listening to my new Sharon Tedford CD. I miss my TAFA friends greatly. I want God to overwhelm me with His love and mercy. I want relief from this thorn in my flesh.</span></span></span><br />
<span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"></span></span></span><br />
<span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent">November 11, 2009</span></span></span><br />
<span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent">is allowing the healing power of Scripture and music to wash over her...</span></span></span></span><br />
<span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"></span></span></span></span><br />
<span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent">November 29, 2009</span></span></span></span><br />
<span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent">only eleven days until it's all over. ELEVEN DAYS!!!!</span></span></span></span></span><br />
<span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent">November 30, 2009</span></span></span></span></span><br />
<span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent">got a lot done today, and there are only 6-8 more school days left of this terribly long semester...and yet the finish line still seems very far away and I've all but lost the will to win the race...</span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent">March 23, 2010</span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent">feels very much that she has lost her muchness.</span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent">March 30, 2010</span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent">somehow - and I truly am not quite sure how - God will resurrect my life from this pit it's currently in. Somehow His holy Name will be praised, and somehow my life will be turned around. Somehow I will bring Him glory. Right now it seems impossible - I feel drowned in my sin nature. But somehow, through His strength, I will become the woman of God He always meant me to be. Soli Deo Gloria.</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent">After two years of ministry, growth, and God working in my heart...</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent">October 1, 2012</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent">Is there a better way to start off a new week of school than with voice class? I didn't think so.</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent">October 10, 2012</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent">Best. Voice class. Ever. Soft palate aerobics, Ms. Gilbert's modern interpretive dance accompaniment, learning that Mozart (NOT Barney) originally composed the tune to "Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star," plus a (mostly) successful voice test #2, makes for a wonderful start to my Wednesday!</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent">October 18, 2012</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent">Today I have two rehearsals, studio, piano, and then the French Connection showcase tonight! So excited to play in my first concert in 3 years! Also, Steve and Jan Gaukroger are here to visit, which is SO exciting, so all in all, this will be an excellent evening and a great weekend :)</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent">October 22, 2012</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent">Things for which I am VERY grateful today: 1. The fact that I am actually NOT enrolled in a math class and have therefore NOT missed every class so far this semester, as I dreamed the situation was last night. 2. I think I might actually sort of be prepared for my jury tomorrow! 3. I get to hang out with Samuel Gaukroger and Briley Foster this evening! 4. The fact that tomorrow I DO get to go to BSF!!! So very blessed - God is so good :)</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent">October 30, 2012</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent">lesson is done, jury results are in (3 passes, YAY!), chair test results are in (5th instead of 4th...essentially no difference!), no studio today, and flute choir concert tonight!!!</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent">FLUTE CHOIR CONCERT WAS AMAZING!!!!! And now I am so tired it's unreal. Looking forward to voice class and getting my second sociology exam out of the way tomorrow...this will be an excellent weekend :)</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent">February 5, 2013</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent">today has been a day overflowing with God's provision! School was awesome today, and financial needs have been met as well. And who doesn't love a good dinner with Rachel Halla, Megan Robinson and Natalie Rizvi? I know I definitely do :) So grateful for wonderful friends and a God who really sees and provides for everything perfectly!</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent">March 20, 2013</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent">Getting ready for tomorrow - I get to go to Austin with some wonderful people from school to play bass flute at the Capitol building at the swearing-in ceremony of a senator (Silvia Garcia, I think) who happens to be a TWU alum! I also get to miss all my classes :) pretty excited for this opportunity!...except that our call time to meet is at 5:45am, ugh. But still, it'll be an awesome day :)</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent">I'm seriously so glad to see the change in my life, attitude, maturity level and heart. God deserves every bit of credit for doing amazing things in my life. 2 Thessalonians 1:5 "All this is proof that God's judgment is right..."</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"><span class="userContent"></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span>Kathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07875437304634395430noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7269064068470906619.post-32618260207070710842013-02-16T11:40:00.000-08:002013-02-16T11:46:33.326-08:00oh, how He lovesSome music and lyrics that have been on my mind this weekend - I've bolded the phrases I've found to be particularly noteworthy.<br />
<br />
<br />
Where are You, God of the heavens above?<br />
Why do You hide from our pain?<br />
With questions and weeping I call on You now<br />
Your presence is all that I need<br />
<br />
I bring my confusion, helpless request<br />
This empty and transient world<br />
<strong><em>To the God who has answered me well in the past</em></strong><br />
<strong>The God who's acquainted with pain...</strong><br />
<br />
I will trust in the One who's established His might<br />
The Servant who's reigning on high<br />
Whose unfailing mercy is solid and clear<br />
I patiently wait here in peace<br />
His presence is all that I need<br />
(Where Are You, God? by Sharon Tedford)<br />
<br />
<br />
God says, “Rebuild the road!<br />
<span class="indent-1"><span class="indent-1-breaks"> </span><span class="text Isa-57-14">Clear away the rocks and stones</span></span><br />
<span class="indent-1"><span class="indent-1-breaks"> </span><span class="text Isa-57-14">so my people can return from captivity.”</span></span><br />
<span class="text Isa-57-15" id="en-NLT-18757"><sup>15</sup>The high and lofty one who lives in eternity,</span><br />
<span class="indent-1"><span class="indent-1-breaks"> </span><span class="text Isa-57-15">the Holy One, says this:</span></span><br />
<strong><span class="text Isa-57-15">“I live in the high and holy place</span><br /><span class="indent-1"><span class="indent-1-breaks"> </span><span class="text Isa-57-15">with those whose spirits are contrite and humble.</span></span><br /><em><span class="text Isa-57-15">I restore the crushed spirit of the humble</span></em></strong><span class="indent-1"><span class="indent-1-breaks"><strong> </strong></span><span class="text Isa-57-15"><strong>and revive the courage of those with repentant hearts</strong>.</span></span><br />
<span class="text Isa-57-16" id="en-NLT-18758"><sup class="versenum">16 </sup>For I will not fight against you forever;</span><br />
<span class="indent-1"><span class="indent-1-breaks"> </span><span class="text Isa-57-16">I will not always be angry.</span></span><br />
<span class="text Isa-57-16">If I were, all people would pass away—</span><br />
<span class="indent-1"><span class="indent-1-breaks"> </span><span class="text Isa-57-16">all the souls I have made. <br />~Isaiah 57:14-16, ESV</span></span><br />
<span class="indent-1"><span class="text Isa-57-16"></span></span><br />
<span class="indent-1"><span class="text Isa-57-16"><sup><span style="font-size: x-small;">17 </span></sup>The <span class="small-caps" style="font-variant: small-caps;">Lord</span> hears his people when they call to him for help.<br /><span class="indent-1"><span class="indent-1-breaks"> </span><span class="text Ps-34-17">He rescues them from all their troubles.</span></span><br /><span class="text Ps-34-18" id="en-NLT-14383"><sup class="versenum">18 </sup><strong>The <span class="small-caps" style="font-variant: small-caps;">Lord</span> is close to the brokenhearted;</strong></span><br /><span class="indent-1"><span class="indent-1-breaks"><strong> </strong></span><span class="text Ps-34-18"><strong>he rescues those whose spirits are crushed</strong>.</span></span></span></span><br />
<span class="indent-1"><span class="text Isa-57-16"><span class="indent-1"><span class="text Ps-34-18">~Psalm 34:17-18, NLT</span></span></span></span><br />
<span class="indent-1"><span class="text Isa-57-16"><span class="indent-1"><span class="text Ps-34-18"></span></span></span></span><br />
<span class="indent-1"><span class="text Isa-57-16"><span class="indent-1"><span class="text Ps-34-18">Because <strong>Your steadfast love is better than life</strong>, my lips will praise You. ~Psalm 63:3, ESV</span></span></span></span><br />
<span class="indent-1"><span class="text Isa-57-16"><span class="indent-1"><span class="text Ps-34-18"></span></span></span></span><br />
<span class="indent-1"><span class="text Isa-57-16"><span class="indent-1"><span class="text Ps-34-18"><sup><span style="font-size: x-small;">2 </span></sup>For you are <sup class="crossreference" value="(<a href="#cen-ESV-14569D" title="See cross-reference D">D</a>)"></sup>the God in whom I take refuge;<br /><span class="indent-1"><span class="indent-1-breaks"> </span><span class="text Ps-43-2">why have you <sup class="crossreference" value="(<a href="#cen-ESV-14569E" title="See cross-reference E">E</a>)"></sup>rejected me?</span></span><br /><span class="text Ps-43-2">Why do I <sup class="crossreference" value="(<a href="#cen-ESV-14569F" title="See cross-reference F">F</a>)"></sup>go about mourning</span><br /><span class="indent-1"><span class="indent-1-breaks"> </span><span class="text Ps-43-2">because of the oppression of the enemy?</span></span> </span></span></span></span><br />
<div class="poetry top-1">
<div class="line">
<span class="text Ps-43-3" id="en-ESV-14570"><sup class="versenum">3 </sup><sup class="crossreference" value="(<a href="#cen-ESV-14570G" title="See cross-reference G">G</a>)"></sup><strong>Send out your light and your truth;</strong></span><br />
<strong><span class="indent-1"><span class="indent-1-breaks"> </span><span class="text Ps-43-3">let them lead me;</span></span><br /><span class="text Ps-43-3">let them bring me to your <sup class="crossreference" value="(<a href="#cen-ESV-14570H" title="See cross-reference H">H</a>)"></sup>holy hill</span><br /><span class="indent-1"><span class="indent-1-breaks"> </span><span class="text Ps-43-3">and to your <sup class="crossreference" value="(<a href="#cen-ESV-14570I" title="See cross-reference I">I</a>)"></sup>dwelling!</span></span></strong><span class="text Ps-43-4" id="en-ESV-14571"><sup class="versenum">4 </sup>Then I will go to the altar of God,</span><br />
<span class="indent-1"><span class="indent-1-breaks"> </span><span class="text Ps-43-4">to God my exceeding joy,</span></span><br />
<span class="text Ps-43-4">and I will praise you with the lyre,</span><br />
<span class="indent-1"><span class="indent-1-breaks"> </span><span class="text Ps-43-4">O God, my God.</span></span></div>
</div>
<br />
<div class="poetry top-1">
<div class="line">
<span class="text Ps-43-5" id="en-ESV-14572"><sup class="versenum">5 </sup><sup class="crossreference" value="(<a href="#cen-ESV-14572J" title="See cross-reference J">J</a>)"></sup>Why are you cast down, O my soul,</span><br />
<span class="indent-1"><span class="indent-1-breaks"> </span><span class="text Ps-43-5">and why are you in turmoil within me?</span></span><br />
<span class="text Ps-43-5"><sup class="crossreference" value="(<a href="#cen-ESV-14572K" title="See cross-reference K">K</a>)"></sup><strong>Hope in God; for I shall again praise him,</strong></span><br />
<span class="indent-1"><span class="indent-1-breaks"> </span><span class="text Ps-43-5">my salvation and my God.</span></span></div>
<div class="line">
<span class="indent-1"><span class="text Ps-43-5">~Psalm 43:2-5, ESV</span></span></div>
<div class="line">
</div>
<div class="line">
<sup><span style="font-size: x-small;">25 </span></sup><strong>I know that my Redeemer lives,<sup class="crossreference" value="(<a href="#cen-NIV1984-13323D" title="See cross-reference D">D</a>)"></sup></strong><span class="indent-1"><span class="text Job-19-25">and that in the end he will stand upon the earth.</span></span><br />
<span class="text Job-19-26" id="en-NIV1984-13324"><sup class="versenum">26 </sup>And after my skin has been destroyed,</span><br />
<span class="indent-1"><span class="indent-1-breaks"> </span><span class="text Job-19-26"><strong>yet in my flesh I will see God</strong>.</span></span></div>
<div class="line">
<span class="indent-1"><span class="text Job-19-26">~Job 19:25-26, NIV 1984</span></span></div>
<div class="line">
<span class="indent-1"><span class="text Job-19-26"></span></span> </div>
<div class="line">
<span class="indent-1"><span class="text Job-19-26"></span></span> </div>
<div class="line">
<span class="indent-1"><span class="text Job-19-26">Perfect salvation, <strong>all is at rest</strong></span></span></div>
<div class="line">
<span class="indent-1"><span class="text Job-19-26">I in my Savior am happy and blessed</span></span></div>
<div class="line">
<span class="indent-1"><span class="text Job-19-26">Watching and waiting, looking above</span></span></div>
<div class="line">
<span class="indent-1"><span class="text Job-19-26">Filled with His goodness, <strong>I am lost in His love</strong>!</span></span><br />
(Blessed Assurance by Fanny Crosby)</div>
<div class="line">
<span class="indent-1"><span class="text Job-19-26"></span></span> </div>
<div class="line">
<span class="indent-1"><span class="text Job-19-26"></span></span> </div>
<div class="line">
<span class="indent-1"><span class="text Job-19-26">Death could not keep Him imprisoned</span></span></div>
<div class="line">
<span class="indent-1"><span class="text Job-19-26">He burst through the shackles of hell</span></span></div>
<div class="line">
<span class="indent-1"><span class="text Job-19-26">He settled the score with the evil one</span></span></div>
<div class="line">
<span class="indent-1"><span class="text Job-19-26">and heaven applauds the King</span></span></div>
<div class="line">
<span class="indent-1"><span class="text Job-19-26"><strong>The fullness of Christ is my treasure</strong></span></span></div>
<div class="line">
<span class="indent-1"><span class="text Job-19-26">I've cast off the past with its shame</span></span></div>
<div class="line">
<span class="indent-1"><span class="text Job-19-26"><strong>The power of the Father has raised me to life</strong></span></span></div>
<div class="line">
<span class="indent-1"><span class="text Job-19-26">I'm a son, I'm forgiven and free!</span></span><br />
(Pageant of Triumph by Dave Fellingham)</div>
<div class="line">
<span class="indent-1"><span class="text Job-19-26"></span></span> </div>
<div class="line">
</div>
<span class="indent-1"><span class="text Job-19-26"><span class="text Rom-8-31" id="en-NIV1984-28133"><sup class="versenum">31 </sup>What, then, shall we say in response to this?<sup class="crossreference" value="(<a href="#cen-NIV1984-28133BO" title="See cross-reference BO">BO</a>)"></sup> If God is for us,<sup class="crossreference" value="(<a href="#cen-NIV1984-28133BP" title="See cross-reference BP">BP</a>)"></sup> who can be against us?<sup class="crossreference" value="(<a href="#cen-NIV1984-28133BQ" title="See cross-reference BQ">BQ</a>)"></sup></span> <span class="text Rom-8-32" id="en-NIV1984-28134"><sup class="versenum">32 </sup><strong>He who did not spare his own Son,<sup class="crossreference" value="(<a href="#cen-NIV1984-28134BR" title="See cross-reference BR">BR</a>)"></sup> but gave him up for us all—how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things?</strong></span> <span class="text Rom-8-33" id="en-NIV1984-28135"><sup class="versenum">33 </sup>Who will bring any charge<sup class="crossreference" value="(<a href="#cen-NIV1984-28135BS" title="See cross-reference BS">BS</a>)"></sup> against those whom God has chosen? It is God who justifies.</span> <span class="text Rom-8-34" id="en-NIV1984-28136"><sup class="versenum">34 </sup>Who is he that condemns?<sup class="crossreference" value="(<a href="#cen-NIV1984-28136BT" title="See cross-reference BT">BT</a>)"></sup> Christ Jesus, who died<sup class="crossreference" value="(<a href="#cen-NIV1984-28136BU" title="See cross-reference BU">BU</a>)"></sup>—more than that, who was raised to life<sup class="crossreference" value="(<a href="#cen-NIV1984-28136BV" title="See cross-reference BV">BV</a>)"></sup>—is at the right hand of God<sup class="crossreference" value="(<a href="#cen-NIV1984-28136BW" title="See cross-reference BW">BW</a>)"></sup> and is also interceding for us.<sup class="crossreference" value="(<a href="#cen-NIV1984-28136BX" title="See cross-reference BX">BX</a>)"></sup></span> <span class="text Rom-8-35" id="en-NIV1984-28137"><sup class="versenum">35 </sup>Who shall separate us from the love of Christ?<sup class="crossreference" value="(<a href="#cen-NIV1984-28137BY" title="See cross-reference BY">BY</a>)"></sup> Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword?<sup class="crossreference" value="(<a href="#cen-NIV1984-28137BZ" title="See cross-reference BZ">BZ</a>)"></sup></span> <span class="text Rom-8-36" id="en-NIV1984-28138"><sup class="versenum">36 </sup>As it is written:</span><br />
</span></span><br />
<span class="indent-1"><span class="text Job-19-26"><div class="poetry top-half">
<div class="line">
<span class="text Rom-8-36">“For your sake we face death all day long;</span><br />
<span class="indent-1"><span class="indent-1-breaks"> </span><span class="text Rom-8-36">we are considered as sheep to be slaughtered.”</span></span></div>
</div>
<div class="line">
</div>
<div class="top-half">
<span class="text Rom-8-37" id="en-NIV1984-28139"><sup class="versenum">37 </sup>No, in all these things we are more than conquerors<sup class="crossreference" value="(<a href="#cen-NIV1984-28139CB" title="See cross-reference CB">CB</a>)"></sup> through him who loved us.<sup class="crossreference" value="(<a href="#cen-NIV1984-28139CC" title="See cross-reference CC">CC</a>)"></sup></span> <span class="text Rom-8-38" id="en-NIV1984-28140"><sup class="versenum">38 </sup><strong>For I am convinced that neither death nor life</strong>, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future,<sup class="crossreference" value="(<a href="#cen-NIV1984-28140CD" title="See cross-reference CD">CD</a>)"></sup> nor any powers,<sup class="crossreference" value="(<a href="#cen-NIV1984-28140CE" title="See cross-reference CE">CE</a>)"></sup></span> <span class="text Rom-8-39" id="en-NIV1984-28141"><sup class="versenum">39 </sup>neither height nor depth, <strong>nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the<em> love of God<sup class="crossreference" value="(<a href="#cen-NIV1984-28141CF" title="See cross-reference CF">CF</a>)"></sup></em> that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.</strong></span></div>
<div class="top-half">
<span class="text Rom-8-39">~Romans 8:31-39, NIV 1984</span></div>
<div class="top-half">
<span class="text Rom-8-39"></span> </div>
<div class="top-half">
<span class="text Rom-8-39"></span> </div>
<div class="top-half">
<span class="text Rom-8-39">I hear the Savior say, "Thy strength indeed is small</span></div>
<div class="top-half">
<span class="text Rom-8-39">Child of weakness, watch and pray</span></div>
<div class="top-half">
<span class="text Rom-8-39">Find in Me thine all in all."</span></div>
<div class="top-half">
<span class="text Rom-8-39"></span><strong> </strong></div>
<strong>
</strong><div class="top-half">
<span class="text Rom-8-39"><strong>Oh praise the One who paid my debt and raised this life up from the dead</strong>!</span><br />
(Jesus Paid It All by Elvina M. Hall)</div>
</span></span><br /></div>
Kathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07875437304634395430noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7269064068470906619.post-74917622644751190642013-02-06T20:34:00.002-08:002013-02-06T20:43:38.895-08:00loves like a hurricaneBecause <strong>Your love is<u> better than life</u></strong>, my lips will glorify You. (NIV 1984)<br />
<br />
<em>Your unfailing love is <u>better than life itself</u></em>; how I praise You! (NLT)<br />
<br />
Because<strong> Your steadfast love is <em>better than life</em></strong>, my lips will praise You. (ESV)<br />
<br />
Because <u>Thy lovingkindness is<em> better than life</em></u>, my lips shall praise Thee. (KJV)<br />
<br />
<em>In Your generous love I am <strong>really living</strong> at last!</em> My lips brim praises like fountains. (MSG)<br />
<br />
~Psalm 63:3<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
I cannot wrap my head around this verse. I totally understand the logic of it: if you believe that God's love is better than life itself, it seems only natural that your response would indeed be praise. But what does it mean that God's love is better than <em>life</em>?? Better than life. God's love is better than life! I just can't quite get my head around that phrase. What does it mean in my life?<br />
<br />
(I looked for commentaries on this verse and found a paragraph written by Timothy Cruso, a 17th century English Puritan who was supposedly friends with Daniel Defoe)<br />
<br />
"The love of life is a very frequent and pernicious snare, which a sense of God's love must deliver us from being entangled by." I had to look up the word <em>pernicious</em> to get a full sense of the meaning, and it means "having a harmful effect, especially in a gradual or subtle way." Cruso could not be more spot-on in this sentence. What things in my life entangle me? My love of comfort, for sure. Being comfortably fed can become a huge trap for me if I let it. Being entertained by books or movies, instead of doing homework or practicing. Staying home and watching TV instead of going out and investing in relationships I know God is calling me to strengthen. Spending my money on clothes and accessories for myself, when I know I need to be saving it or giving it to His Church instead. But God is so much bigger, so deserving of honor and glory and praise - how can I possibly love "life" better than Him?? What is "life" if not a gift straight from God, to be lived in praise to Him?<br />
<br />
"What so desirable as life, if a man have no place in the heart of God? This is the greatest temporal blessing, and nothing can outdo it, but the favour of the God of our life; and this excels indeed. <strong>What comparison is there between the breath in our nostrils, and the favour of an eternal God?</strong> any more than there is between an everlasting light and a poor vanishing vapour."<br />
<br />
I love the bolded phrase. God is the one who <em>gave</em> me life, yet what comparison <em>can</em> be made between anything else and Him? "To whom then will you liken God, or what likeness compare with Him?" (Is 40:18) His love caused Him to send His Son into the world to die for my sins so that I could be saved, redeemed, reconciled, made new. "And I am convinced that nothing can separate us from God's love." (Romans 8:38) Paul knew. Paul understood. He fully and totally believed with all his heart that God's love was indeed better than life, and he praised Him for that. After all, what does the verse say? <br />
<br />
"My lips will glorify You." "My lips shall praise Thee." "How I praise You!" "My lips brim praises like fountains." How can I do this in my own life? Back to the commentary, this time by Thomas Sheppard...<br />
<br />
"Is it possible that any man should love another and not commend him, nor speak of him? If thou hast but a hawk or a hound that thou lovest, thou wilt commend it; <strong>and can it stand with love to Christ, yet seldom or never to speak of him nor of his love, never to commend him unto others, that they may fall in love with him also?</strong>...Can it stand with this life of love, to be always speaking about worldly affairs, or news at the best; both weekday and Sabbath day, in bed and at board, in good company and in bad, at home and abroad? I tell you, <strong>it will be one main reason why you desire to live, that you may make the Lord Jesus known to your children, friends, acquittance, that so in the ages to come his name might ring, and his memorial might be of sweet odour, from generation to generation.</strong>"<br />
<br />
I will be honest and admit that I have very few specific ideas as to how I make my Savior known in my day-to-day life at school. This will just have to be another thing to add to my endless list of things I need to be praying about. Meanwhile, I'm still gnawing on the ideas of the verse...<br />
<br />
"Because Your steadfast love is better than life, my lips will praise You."<br />
<br />
God, show me what that verse really means and how I can tangibly live out that verse at school, at home and in my community. I recognize the astounding truths in that verse - now help me understand them and practice them!<br />
<br />Kathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07875437304634395430noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7269064068470906619.post-84638234891098256042013-01-30T20:45:00.000-08:002013-01-30T20:45:24.625-08:00awestruck we fall to our knees as we humbly proclaim2013 is finally here!!!!! As amazing as 2012 was in so many ways, I am so grateful for this new year (which is already almost into February, I can't BELIEVE it!). This year is a whole new start for me. I will spend this entire year in school, for one thing, which also means I will spend it in Denton. If I'm lucky. Things I am praying for:<br />
<br />
<ul>
<li>I SOOOOO want a job in Denton over the summer. If all else fails, I will go back to my Chick-fil-A in Dallas, but honestly, I maxed out there about three years ago. I'd really, really like to move beyond that store. And I'd really, <em>really</em> like to stay in Denton for the summer. So I'd love a job still in the food service industry - maybe Starbucks, maybe a waitress job, or even if I could work at one of the Denton CFAs, that would be better than having to move back to Dallas...so very much wondering what God has in mind to do!</li>
<li>I would also love, love, <em>LOVE</em> to go on a mission trip of some kind over the summer. Ideally I would like to go back to the Bowery in NYC, but I would also be beyond excited to spend a week or so at BSF headquarters in San Antonio. Much closer and much more affordable and much easier to arrange than the Bowery. Again, very much hoping God has some sort of opportunity like this up His sleeve for me this summer... :)</li>
<li>My roommate situation come July. My lease on my apartment is up then, and Sam keeps talking as though he's moving out then, which - well, he knows what he's doing at least slightly better than I do, but really, who on earth can say what he'll end up doing come July. If he moves out, I'll need a roommate or else a heck of a lot more money than I can currently imagine having. And there are very few people I can imagine living with in any situation, and even fewer who I can think of who would actually be able/willing to move in with me. I desperately do not want to move out of my apartment, like I so so so so SOOOOOO BAD DO NOT WANT TO MOVE. So God might have to do something crazy in July to find me a roommate!!!</li>
</ul>
All in all, God is going to be doing some crazy, crazy, unexpected things in my life when the spring semester is over. I'm a bit nervous anticipating it all, because honestly it will have to be SO crazy! This time in August, I wonder what will be going on...I'll never be able to imagine it, so good thing God's got it all in His way and His time. Honestly, it sucks that His time and my time are so damn different. Ugh. I'm still not entirely convinced He's seen <em>my</em> version of the way this summer should go, because really, I've got it all worked out. If His way lines up with mine, great! We're all winners. I just wish He would tell me <em>beforehand</em>, so I can be totally sure...sigh. "But my thoughts are not your thoughts, and my ways are not your ways, declares the LORD Almighty..."<br />
<br />
Anyway, this semester so far is going excellently. I'm taking Conducting, Vocal Ensemble, Understanding the Arts, private flute lessons, Flute Choir (for which I am playing bass flute, <em>so cool!!!)</em>, Wind Symphony (for which I sit s<em>econd chair</em> next to my friend Stephanie, YAY!!!!), and Women in Music. Everything I am learning is fascinating and actually useful and beneficial to my education as a musician and a music educator. (Kind of a redundant sentence, but you know what I mean.) I'm really just so pleased with my life at TWU. It's finally beginning to resemble the life I wanted when I first came to Denton in 2008. We've still got a bit of a ways to go, but slowly and surely we're getting there. Really, God's goodness to me is abounding this semester.<br />
<br />
I'm also so, <em>so</em> grateful for my group of BSF girls!!! We are really bonding as a group, and I am absolutely loving it. Since apparently I must be tied to Dallas in some way, BSF is the perfect way. Despite the fact that it takes up more time than my 3 Tuesday classes combined, I wouldn't give it up if you paid me.<br />
<br />
Take my voice and let me sing<br />
Always, only for my King<br />
Take my lips and let them be<br />
Filled with messages from Thee<br />
Filled with messages from TheeKathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07875437304634395430noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7269064068470906619.post-34023372545184987692012-11-30T21:44:00.001-08:002012-11-30T21:44:54.164-08:00with questions and weeping I call on You nowHow in the world do I have pain?<br />
<br />
I have NO PAIN. I live in America, I have rights and freedoms and privileges that millions of people don't even know exist. There are people in this world who will live and die without ever having the protection of their government, who will never vote in an election, who will be forced to worship something they don't believe in or forbidden to worship the way they choose. There are children who will never know love and affection from their parents, who will grow up without ever having a shot or a vaccine or even a dose of children's Tylenol. There are millions of people who haven't eaten food or drunk clean water in weeks. There are people dying every day, being killed by their own government or neighbors or family members. And that's present everywhere, across the globe. What about what's happening in my own neighborhood, on my own street in Denton, Texas?<br />
<br />
There are people who haven't spoken to their mothers in years, unless you count screaming obscenities at them. There are people who give their hearts and their bodies away to anyone who promises them happiness in return, only to be left empty and crushed. There are people who don't even know their own cousins' first names. There are people whose loved ones are dying, or stricken with a disease or disability. There are people who are filled with hate, with anger, with self-loathing, with depression. There are people whose lives are hollow, meaningless, despite their families or their jobs or the routines of life they choose to continue, day after meaningless day. There are people who have no joy. There are people who are truly experiencing pain.<br />
<br />
My heart bleeds for them. My heart screams out for them. I don't know what to do with this pain, and sometimes I don't even recognize it as my own. I understand now why people will intentionally cut themselves: maybe they are trying to focus, for once, on a pain that makes perfect sense. Another good reason to do it: that pain can be cured. Easily. Stop the bleeding, apply a Band-aid, and in about 30 minutes that pain should be gone. <br />
<br />
There's no solution to an aching heart. How on earth can this pain be dealt with? What prescription can fix it? <br />
<br />
Scripture. James 1:27.<br />
<br />
"Pure and genuine religion in the sight of God the Father means caring for orphans and widows in their distress and refusing to let the world corrupt you." (NLT)<br />
<br />
Caring for the needy in their distress. Caring for the needy! There are so many needy people everywhere you look. The task at hand is overwhelming. Where to start? Oh, God, tell me where to start! I have no idea! There are too many broken people, including myself, and I can't do this task. I can't help anyone unless You show me where to start and how to do it.<br />
<br />
I want to care for the needy in New York City, and I want to start by caring for the needy in Denton, Texas. I want to care for the homeless, the outcasts, the former members of society. I want to love them and meet some basic, general needs. I want to help teens who have everything, know everything, understand everything, but don't care. I want to lead Bible studies for them, have the guts to call them out on their behavior, address their issues, see them fail, broken, repentant, successful. I want to build a life as a servant of Christ, who lived as He did and loved as He did. <br />
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How can I have any pain of my own, other than that of seeing the pain of lives lived without Christ? Literally, <em>where</em> does any other kind of pain come from in me?? <em>I do not understand</em>. <br />
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May the love of Jesus fill me as the waters fill the sea; Him exalting, self abasing - this is victory.<br />
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May the peace of Christ my Savior rule my life in everything, that I may be calm to comfort sick and sorrowing.<br />
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May His beauty rest upon me as I seek the lost to win, and may they forget the channel, seeing only Him.<br />
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"God comforts. He doesn't pity. He picks us up, dries our tears, soothes our fears, and lifts our thoughts beyond the hurt." ~Robert Schuller<br />
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"God walks with us.... He scoops us up in His arms or simply sits with us in silent strength until we cannot avoid the awesome recognition that yes, even now, He is here." ~Gloria Gaither<br />
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"Time passed in silence with God is time spent growing in relationship with Him. And time spent letting His love flow through you to others is an investment in eternity." ~Amy and Judge Reinhold<br />
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I am becoming more and more sure of a few things:<br />
<br />
1. I will spend time in Denton, wherever else I live, and in New York City caring for the homeless. I will find ways to do this in Denton via my church, Christ Community Church, and I will go back someday to the Bowery Mission in NYC and participate in the amazing ministry there for the third time in my life.<br />
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2. I will be an educator of some sort and I will work with children, primarily teens, and I will educate them not just in music or English or history or - God forbid - algebra, but how <em>to live</em>. How to come alive, how to actually care about life once again, how to live with joy because of Jesus.<br />
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3. Someday <em>- someday </em>- I will most likely get married. And if I do get married - and possibly even if I don't - I will do foster care and/or adoption. There are too many children who need safe, loving, Christ-filled homes to stay in for me to not open my own home to them. <br />
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4. Because of the above things that will happen, I fully anticipate times in the next fifty years of my life when my heart will be so full of love and wonder and happiness and <em>joy</em> that I'll hardly be able to bear it. I will be able to do nothing but fall on my knees and praise and worship God for who He is and what He's done! And then there will be times when my heart will shatter into a thousand pieces and I will absolutely not be able to bear it at all. I will be so angry at God for allowing me to bear these burdens, to feel this pain and <em>not</em> be able to cure it - yet suffering for Christ is the ultimate privilege. "So if you are suffering in a manner that pleases God, keep on doing what is right, and trust your lives to the God who created you, for He will never fail you." ~1 Peter 4:19<br />
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I can't wait for these stages of life to start. Oh my goodness, I can't wait.Kathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07875437304634395430noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7269064068470906619.post-82449496253544088702012-11-02T20:39:00.003-07:002012-11-02T21:06:35.562-07:00I'm all for you, body and soulThis post has been very interesting to write. It's taken me three hours to finish! I'm going to attempt NOT to preach, not to condemn, and not to sound like I don't know what I'm talking about. I'm just going to compare the purity myth to my own experiences.<br />
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The purity myth: what the heck is that? Jessica Valenti, a feminist writer, defines it thusly: "The lie of virginity - the idea that such a thing even exists - is ensuring that young women's perception of themselves is inextricable from their bodies, and that their ability to be moral actors is absolutely dependent on their sexuality....So while young women are subject to overt sexual messages every day, they're simultaneously being taught - by the people who are supposed to care for their personal and moral development, no less - that their only real worth is their virginity and their ability to remain 'pure.'" <br />
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First off, by way of a quick explanation, Ms. Valenti says that virginity does not exist because there is no definition of it. She claims that there is no medical, scientific definition of virginity. The dictionary definition is simply "a person that has never had sexual intercourse." Well great, but then of course we must define sexual intercourse: is it vaginal sex? Oral? Anal? Does heavy petting count as sex? <em>How far is too far??</em> I haven't done enough research to answer her claim, but just from what I've said in this paragraph, I would say that technical "virginity" doesn't matter as much as purity does. You can engage in heavy petting and your "virginity" may very well remain intact - but your purity is compromised.<br />
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There is definitely a double standard where purity is concerned. If a woman sleeps around, she is labeled as a slut, a whore, a skank with no pride and no shame, and looked down upon and condemned. If a man sleeps around, he is labeled a ladies' man, a stud, or a player at worst, and he is usually congratulated and looked up to. Sexual violence against women is often blamed on the women themselves, as though they brought this upon themselves by daring to have had consensual sexual encounters before. <br />
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Ms. Valenti continues: "I've always found the idea of 'saving' your virginity intriguing - it's not like we're Saran-wrapping our hymens away in the freezer, after all, or pasting them in scrapbooks (admittedly, not the best visual - my apologies). But packed-away virginities aside, the interesting - and dangerous - idea at play here is that of 'morality.' When young women are taught about morality, there's not often talk of compassion, kindness, courage or integrity. There is, however, a lot of talk about hymens (though the preferred words are undoubtedly more refined - think 'virginity' and 'chastity'): if we have them, when we'll lose them, and under what circumstances we'll be rid of them."<br />
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I don't know what kind of home Ms. Valenti was raised in, and I have no idea how many families she's interviewed who apparently are currently raising their daughters to believe that virginity is the end-all be-all of a woman's existence. But it doesn't seem to be much like the upbringing I experienced, nor many that I have observed. Morality in my upbringing had little to do with being a virgin and everything to do with compassion, kindness, courage, integrity, and more. Honesty, humility, generosity, obedience, all these things were taught to me from a very young age. Something that was hardly taught at all was anything to do with sex.<br />
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This is where it gets a little awkward, but I'm going to be honest here. First of all, yes, I am a virgin, and I am proud of that. I'm twenty-four years old (well I will be on Monday!), and I have never had sex. I've never even kissed anyone. I've never had a boyfriend. And every single bit of information I know about sex, I learned from a book. No one has ever had "the talk" with me. Not one person has ever given me any spoken information about sex. I've never heard anyone actually speak about what it feels like, how to do it, how long it lasts, what happens after. I got my first period when I was eleven; not long after that, my mom handed me a book (appropriately) called Almost Twelve and told me to read it. It would tell me everything I needed to know about menstruation and about the changes that were beginning to happen to my body. I'm sure she added that if I had questions, I could come to her and ask, but I don't remember that specifically, probably because I never did ask her any questions. I've never once talked about sex to my mom, or my older sister, or my aunts, or any other of the older females in my life that all the books say you should talk to about it. I was far too - I guess "embarrassed" is the best word to use. When I read about sex - the actual act of sexual intercourse, what it is and how it happens - well, I thought it was really just <em>gross.</em> Who would want to do that? There is no way that feels good. There is no way people find those parts of the human anatomy to be anything other than just - well, just g<em>ross.</em> When I realized that a number of my girlfriends knew what sex was too, I did nothing more than confirm with them that apparently that really was what it was, and that really is how it works, and people really do enjoy it - but <em>we</em> all knew it was <em>gross</em>! - before I put it out of my mind.<br />
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That was all when I was twelve, and honestly, I don't think I thought much about sex or spoke about sex to anyone at all (other than love scenes in movies and things of that nature) until I was eighteen or nineteen. I would never have asked my mom questions about it, really. I would have been too embarrassed to ask my mom anything about it, and I think she would have been nearly as embarrassed to answer (though I feel confident she <em>would</em> have answered in <em>some</em> way). I knew everything I needed to know: I knew technically what sexual intercourse was, and I knew that God created it as a gift <em>only</em> to be done between husbands and wives, and any sex outside of marriage was a sin against Him. Oh yeah, that's right - I was raised in a Christian home. I was also home schooled. So you can bet I was sheltered. Oh yes, I was sheltered. I never had a "health class," not like the ones you hear about these days, where either condoms are rolled down bananas or abstinence-only education is screamed in the students' faces. I learned about sex from books. Books written by conservative Christian men, books that told me what sex was and that it was only to be done between a husband and a wife, and anything else was sin. Books that Jessica Valenti would mock and then rip to pieces. <br />
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And yes, I will admit that one day when I was probably fourteen or so, I picked up a stray romance novel from a stack of books that someone had left on my table at the library. And when I got to a certain scene in the book, I was shocked. Shocked that not only were these two characters having sex, but they were not married to one another, and they both seemed to be thinking and feeling and desiring things I had never dreamed of. I didn't understand it. Oh sure, I'd seen stuff in movies and TV, but nothing that had told me exactly, specifically, what the characters were thinking. Nothing that could tell me exactly what they did and why they wanted to do it. Now while I have certainly steered clear of the romance sections of libraries and bookstores, that wasn't the only such scene I've ever read in books. I've learned a lot about sex from reading fiction, though most of that reading was done after I graduated high school! When I was in high school, I never experienced the temptation to have sex. Almost all the boys I knew were just like me - Christian and home schooled, no doubt having been handed the same kind of book I had when they were twelve too. Every activity I did, every class I took or trip I went on was through church youth group or a home school organization. I can honestly say that when I was in high school, it never once occurred to me that I <em>could</em> have sex. Having sex <em>was</em> within the scope of possibility. I suppose it helped that I never had a boyfriend in high school, so there was never any immediate temptation for any kind of sexual behavior. Oh, I wanted a boyfriend. I wanted to walk down the hall at church holding hands with my boyfriend. I wanted to sit next to my boyfriend in class or meet him in the lunch room at co-op. And looking back, I'm sure I would have agreed to sneak off behind the church for a make-out session every now and then, if I had had a boyfriend. And if I had done that, I'm sure I might have considered seeing how far I could go physically without actually, technically, having sex. Obviously God knew the choices I would make if given the opportunity, so I was fortunate enough to never have had the opportunity! I assumed I was far too smart and sensible to make the wrong decisions - maybe I was and maybe I wasn't. Fortunately, I never had to realize I <em>wasn't!</em> God has really protected me from some serious mistakes.<br />
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Wow, super long rabbit trail. All that is to say, I grew up in a home where sex was not talked about at all. The concept of "saving my virginity for marriage" was never brought up by either of my parents that I can recall. I'm sure I mentioned it in passing in my later teens, and they placed literature in my path that praised the idea, but my parents never sought me out to make sure I had made that commitment. The idea of going to a purity ball, or even wearing a purity ring, was never mentioned at home, and none of my friends wore purity rings either. It was just an assumption among all of us that we would be virgins until marriage. There was never any other way for us in high school. Again, we were fortunate.<br />
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Now, obviously, Jessica Valenti would ask why on earth having sex is a mistake. Clearly, to her, it isn't. And if the only answer I gave her was because the Bible defines sex as being something that belongs only within marriage, she would laugh me right out the door. Not that that would stop me, but I will admit that I do not want to be labeled <em>only</em> as a sheltered little Christian girl who can't think for herself and bases her choices on a 2,000-year-old book that no one cares about anymore. I absolutely <em>do</em> want to be labeled as a Christian who knows what the Bible says and actually, truly, 100% believes it and <em>acts</em> on those beliefs. <br />
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And ironically, those beliefs - and the fact that I care enough about them to hold to them and actually live by them - are the only proof I have that I <em>do </em>have any idea how to think for myself. That I'm not just some crazy little girl who is only doing what she thinks her parents want her to do, who doesn't know how to think any other way.<br />
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Believe me, I know the choices I'm capable of making. And now that I'm twenty-four instead of fourteen, or even sixteen or eighteen, I'm at a point in life where those choices mean so much more.<br />
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If I had sex right now, this very evening, I would feel guilty, empty, degraded, dirty, worthless. Ms. Valenti would say that's because I would no longer have my virginity, the thing society values so much these days. She would say that sex only has whatever meaning I ascribe to it. If I think having sex is nothing particularly special, I can have it with as many men as I want, and that should have no affect on the fact that I am sweet, generous, kind, friendly, and caring. In a way, Ms. Valenti is right: my worth shouldn't be based on whether or not my hymen is still unbroken. (I can't believe I just wrote that sentence, but whatever.) My worth should be based on what I do and how I act in society.<br />
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Well, Ms. Valenti, let me tell you what gives me worth in society. I have the integrity to live by the Bible, and that statement alone will get me guffaws and rolled eyes and mutters under the breath by most of my classmates at college. I have the wisdom to live in a way that is opposite the way I would choose to live otherwise. I have the strength to make choices that earn me shrugs of indifference at best, or ridicule and dismissal as the norm. And one of those choices is to give myself sexually only to my husband. Do I view my virginity as a gift, a "present" to be "given" to someone like a box of chocolates or a new tie? In one sense, no. I don't have some far-fetched idea that sex is just going to be some sort of magical, the-world-turns-upside-down experience that will absolutely blow my mind. There used to be a group on Facebook whose title was exactly what I always thought sex would be: it was called "I'm Saving Myself For Wild, Passionate, Awkward Honeymoon Sex." I fully expect sex to be that way for the first few weeks: wild, passionate, and so, <em>so</em> awkward. And I don't think that I myself am necessarily going to be particularly gifted at it. But in another sense, I do view my virginity as a treasure, a prize, a pearl of great price. I fully intend that only one person will ever take my virginity: my husband. No, I'm not gift-wrapping my hymen and putting it in the freezer or a scrapbook until I meet him (again, I can't believe I just typed that sentence, but whatever...). I just happen to believe in something more than myself. I believe in Someone more than myself. I believe God created sex to be a gift to married couples - why would I ruin something that was intended to be a gift to me? If you don't believe the same way that I do, that's fine, it's your decision, but don't call me a prude for valuing my virginity far more than you value your own.<br />
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All in all, I really have no reason to care about my virginity without my Christian beliefs. If I disregarded those, I'm sure I'd go out to a bar tonight and see who I might meet. I've wondered what it would be like to actually go to a bar and see if anyone tried to pick me up (yes, I have been to bars before, and yes, one or two drunk guys <em>have</em> flirted with me, and no, I never flirted back, and yes, I have been drunk before, and no, I'm not ashamed of any of that!). I've often wondered if that scene, so often done in movies and books, really does happen in real life. (More rabbit trails - sorry! Back to the point!)<br />
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The point is, Jessica Valenti would probably scoff at my decision to view my body as needing to be "protected" and kept "pure." She would probably think I'm just a sad loser who is only a virgin because I haven't found anyone willing to do the deed with me. I'm sorry she thinks that way. I'm sorry anyone thinks that way. I could go on and on and on about the effects sex can have on a person, emotionally and physically, and the dangers of STDs and unwanted pregnancies and abortions and miscarriages and so on and so forth. But I'll spare you that. You can Google those details for yourself. Me, I'm going to continue to value myself and my body. I'm going to continue to <em>not</em> have sex, until I get married, if that ever happens. I'm going to continue to do what I can to protect my purity and the purity of others. If that earns me the label I so dislike, that of a clueless little girl who lives in a bubble and doesn't know any other way...fine. UGH, but fine. You're wrong, but fine. I've already been so blessed by choosing to wait. You can call my husband in ten years and ask if he's happy I waited. <br />
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I'm pretty sure he'll say yes.<br />
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Meanwhile, I have some books to read...and no, none of them are about sex.Kathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07875437304634395430noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7269064068470906619.post-65764064648562817392012-10-20T22:00:00.000-07:002012-10-20T22:04:34.063-07:00I'm just...I mean, this is exhausting.I just prayed that God would prepare for me a life in New York City.<br />
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This is years away, as in it will not happen for real until after I graduate from TWU, but I feel more and more that at that time, my future lies in New York City. For the first time in my life, I am beginning to want to leave Texas. I don't know if I would want to raise a family in New York, but I really do want to live there for at least two or three years after I graduate college. <br />
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This is so strange. It does not at all line up with what I thought my life would be when I was sixteen. Let's see what my life would have been like if I were the one calling all the shots...<br />
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Once I graduated high school in 2007, I would have most likely chosen to go to Texas Tech. The only reason I didn't actually pursue going there was because it was just too big. I wanted a smaller school.<br />
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After my first semester there, I would have sat first chair flute.<br />
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I would have spent my days in a practice room and my evenings with my school and/or church friends, laughing non-stop.<br />
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I would have met a guy my freshman year and been in a relationship by Christmas.<br />
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I would have been married by 21.<br />
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I would have graduated college by 22.<br />
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I would have become a band director immediately after graduation.<br />
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I would have had my first baby by 25.<br />
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I would have had my second baby by 28.<br />
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I would have had my third baby by 30.<br />
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My family would be living in a good house in Dallas and I would be homeschooling my children and living near at least a few childhood friends, who would also be married and beginning to have babies that my children could be friends with. We'd live near my parents too, so they could be involved in their grandchildren's lives, and Mindy and her family would visit a few times a year too.<br />
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Then I would turn 33, maybe 34 or 35. <br />
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But instead, this is what happened.<br />
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I graduated high school in 2007 and went to community college for a year.<br />
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I chose to attend Texas Woman's University and started off with three scholarships and loving my classes.<br />
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I did not sit first chair flute by any means.<br />
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I rarely practiced, despite being beseiged with music.<br />
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I did not make any friends that I ever spoke to outside of class.<br />
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I did not meet a guy. Though to be fair, the odds of that were never in my favor, given the school I chose (and yes, men actually do go to TWU...we went co-ed in the '70's!).<br />
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I dropped out of school when I was 21.<br />
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I spent two years working at Chick-fil-A and a string of unsuccessful minimum wage jobs, most of which I hated.<br />
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I spent two years as a youth leader and one year as a BSF leader, which remain two of the best decisions I've ever made in my entire life.<br />
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I re-applied to TWU when I was 23 and was re-accepted.<br />
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I'm about to turn 24 and have yet to even go on a date, let alone be in a relationship.<br />
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When I graduate college, I will probably be 26. <br />
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I don't even want to think about how old I'll be by the time I get married and have my first baby.<br />
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I want to move to New York City, find a job and volunteer at the Bowery Mission as much as I can around my job.<br />
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I want to find a guy who will either go with me to New York or find a way to come there to be with me, or else meet one there who will share whatever my life turns into once I get there.<br />
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Those two things - moving to New York City and falling in love and getting married - are the two things I want right now more than anything in the world.<br />
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I really think I have some kind of future in New York City. It will be so difficult, so lonely, so hard, I can't even imagine. Once I'm there, I will probably cry myself to sleep six nights a week because of how lonely I am or how worried I am about finances or how difficult I find my job. <br />
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Which is why I need to commit to pray every day for the life I crave in New York City. I need to pray that God will prepare a place for me to live, a place for me to work, and a place for me to fit in. That He will bring me a group of friends that I can see on a regular basis, a church where I can serve, time to volunteer at the Bowery, and a man who will love me and support me and cause me to grow in Christ. A man who I can honor and cherish and love more than anyone else. A man who will marry me. Who on earth could that be?<br />
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My life is turning out so very, very different than I ever thought it would.<br />
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God, please ready my life after graduation, whether that be in New York or Dallas or wherever. Ready my heart for my husband, or if that isn't Your will, make my heart submissive to life as a single woman. The two things I want most - a life in New York and a husband - I lay at Your feet. Take them from me and do with them what You know is best.<br />
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"Wait for the LORD; be strong, and let your heart take courage; wait for the LORD!" ~Psalm 27:14Kathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07875437304634395430noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7269064068470906619.post-66397691624807066382012-09-28T21:20:00.000-07:002012-11-05T19:01:37.829-08:00I'm just crackers about cheese1. Pick 20 of your favorite movies.<br />
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2. Go to IMDb and find a quote from each movie.<br />
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3. Post them here for everyone to guess.<br />
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4. Strike it out when someone guesses correctly, and put who guessed it and the movie.<br />
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5. NO GOOGLING or using IMDb search or other search functions. DON'T CHEAT!<br />
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1. I made a promise, Mr. Frodo. A promise. "Don't you leave him, Samwise Gamgee." And I don't mean to. I don't mean to.<br />
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2. And though I'll think of you, I guess, until the day I die, I think I miss you less and less as every day goes by, Johanna...<br />
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3. Rapunzel? Did I ever tell you I've got a thing for brunettes?<br />
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4. "Gesundheit."<br />
"That's the nicest thing anybody's ever said to me!"<br />
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5. The peasant! At the diner! ...He didn't pay his check.<br />
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6. I want adventure in the great wide somewhere! I want it more than I can tell! And for once it might be grand to have someone understand - I want so much more than they've got planned...<br />
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7. Um...you...you fight good.<br />
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8. Oh well. What's a royal ball? After all, I suppose it would be frightfully dull, and boring, and completely...completely wonderful.<br />
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9. So long...pardner.<br />
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10. "You read my diary?"<br />
"At first I did not know it was your diary, I thought it was a very sad, handwritten book."<br />
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11. "How do I look?"<br />
"Like a new mom. Scared shitless."<br />
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12. "So what do you recommend to encourage affection?"<br />
"Dancing. Even if one's partner is barely tolerable."<br />
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13. I do not envy you the headache you will have when you awaken. But for now, sleep, and dream of large women.<br />
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14. You have no soul, Henslowe, so how can you understand the emptiness that seeks a soulmate?<br />
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15. Up where the smoke is all billowed and curled, 'tween pavement and stars is the chimney sweep's world. Where there's hardly no day, nor hardly no night. There's things half in shadows, and halfway in light. On the rooftops of London - coo - what a sight!<br />
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16. Well, because he thought it was good sport. Because some men aren't looking for anything logical, like money. They can't be bought, bullied, reasoned or negotiated with. Some men just want to watch the world burn.<br />
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17. "William's just turned down Anna Scott."<br />
"You daft prick."<br />
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18. "What are you doing? Get up! You can't sit there! GET UP! "<br />
"Why not? It's a chair."<br />
"No, that. It is not a chair. T-that... that is Saint Edward's chair."<br />
"People have carved their names on it."<br />
"That... chair... is the seat on which every king and queen has... That is the Stone of - you ah-are trivializing everything. You trivialize..."<br />
"It's held in place by a large rock. I don't care about how many royal arseholes have sat in this chair."<br />
"Listen to me. LISTEN TO ME!"<br />
"Listen to you? By what right?"<br />
"By divine right if you must, I am your king."<br />
"No you're not, you told me so yourself. You didn't want it. Why should I waste my time listening?"<br />
"Because I have a right to be heard. I have a voice!"<br />
"...Yes, you do. You have such perseverance Bertie, you're the bravest man I know."<br />
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19. If we went to a Halloween party dressed as Batman and Robin, I'd go as Robin. That's how much you mean to me.<br />
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20. Harry, you are so loved. Mama loves you. Daddy loves you. Harry, be safe. Be strong.<br />
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Well, there you have it. Twenty of my favorite movies. Now I want to watch ALL of them again...Kathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07875437304634395430noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7269064068470906619.post-19779921472582367542012-09-21T15:01:00.001-07:002012-09-21T15:01:59.969-07:00a chair is still a chair, even when there's no one sitting thereIf God created all things, then it is reasonable to say that our chief reason for being is to glorify Him and enjoy Him forever.<br />
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<em>How am I supposed to enjoy Someone who is doing things I don't understand and that are causing me pain? How am I supposed to enjoy Someone who keeps telling me things I don't want to hear, especially when I think things ought to be different?</em><br />
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As vast and powerful as are the forces of nature, God controls them. As mighty as some individuals or governments may seem, God rules them.<br />
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<em>So why doesn't God change that person's heart? Why doesn't God allow the circumstances of this person's life to change? Why doesn't He do what I have been begging Him to do for months?</em><br />
<em></em><br />
"With the Lord a day is like a thousand years, and a thousand years is like a day" ~1 Peter 3:8<br />
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<em>I've been waiting what feels like a thousand years, and I think I'm being asked to wait a thousand more. Do I trust God enough to do that? Do I find enough satisfaction in God alone, and His overwhelming, unending, absolutely amazing love for me, that I can humbly say, "Yes, Lord, I'll keep waiting"? And maybe even mean it?</em><br />
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Are you convinced that God Himself carried out this great work [the creation of the world]? Have you begun to realize that He placed you within His world for His high purpose? How does this change your thoughts and plans for your life? To what are you dedicating your days and years?<br />
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<em>1. I've only been taught this since I was a baby. Yes, of course I am convinced. I've seen enough of the world to know it could never have been created any other way. I've climbed mountains in Colorado, run through fields of wildflowers in England, walked along the beaches of Santa Domingo, even when I was at the top of the Empire State Building in New York City - I know God is the Creator and Redeemer of this amazing world in which I live.</em><br />
<em>2. Another fact I've known for many years. And I know a few general purposes He has for my life: to bring Him glory, to tell others about Him, to minister in some way in a church setting, to teach in some form of school setting. How on earth did He choose me? How did He notice me among the rest of His creation? And what does He have in store for me?? The best years of my life are underway, and I don't want to waste them. I don't want HIM to waste them. What am I thinking??</em><br />
<em>3. I know my life is His, to do with what He wants. BUT WHAT DOES HE WANT FROM ME?? HOW LONG DOES HE WANT ME TO WAIT?? WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO IN THE MEANTIME?</em><br />
<em>4. I don't quite know right now. I'm searching for a ministry, I'm working on being able to teach, and I'm wondering if I will ever be able to have the family I've always dreamed of having. And whether I'll have to wait ten more years for that to happen. I think right now, whether it's a good thing or not, I'm dedicating most of my time to waiting...</em><br />
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The first result of receiving Jesus is that light reveals the former darkness. Jesus, the spiritual light, separeates from darkness. A new way of life, of thinking and acting in the light, then begins. Have you received Jesus into your life? Are you suddenly able to see what you could not understand or appreciate before? What do you plan to do today concerning your emotions, mind, or actions as this light reveals the truth about God and about you?<br />
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<em>Jesus has been Lord of my life since I was eight years old, but I still struggle daily to let Him do His work. I'm pretty sure He doesn't know that my way is better. My way is much more efficient, much quicker, and will save so many people SO much pain - particularly ME. My way is only fair, and quite frankly, I'm a little insulted that He hasn't seemed to grasp just how well it will work and how much time and emotion and energy it will save if we just DID IT MY WAY FOR ONCE!!! Sigh. I have already done this, over and over again, but I plan to pray that God will help my unbelief. Mark 9:24 has been my prayer for months. "I DO believe - help my unbelief!" I am still in darkness about why I am still waiting. Lord Jesus, let my heart submit to whatever it is that You're doing. I will do whatever You want, it doesn't matter. I'll do it. I will. I don't understand why You keep telling me to wait, and wait, and wait, and You don't tell me anything else, and You allow people to make what I am sure are the wrong decisions. How am I supposed to help him, and him, and him, and her, and her, and her, and them? How am I supposed to do this? Help me, Lord Jesus - help my unbelief.</em><br />
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Now that light and life have come through God's Word, will you enter with Him into a new day, separated from the former empty life and completely reoriented to His beautiful purpose?<br />
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<em>His purpose is beautiful. My life in Him is beautiful. The rest of the life I have yet to live in Him will also be beautiful. "<strong>He has made everything beautiful in its time." ~Ecclesiastes 3:11</strong> </em><br />
<em>When will my time come?</em><br />
<em>What am I waiting for?</em><br />
<em></em><br />
<em>My heart, being deceitful above all things and desperately sick (Jeremiah 17:9), wants to continue bemoaning the endless waiting I am enduring, and the pain that accompanies. But my heart is also a temple of the Holy Spirit, and He is leaving this verse on my mind:</em><br />
<em></em><br />
<em>"<strong>But I do not account my life of any value nor as precious to myself, if only I may finish my course and the ministry that I receieved from the Lord Jesus, to testify to the gospel of the grace of God." ~Acts 20:24, ESV</strong></em><br />
<strong><em></em></strong><br />
<em>^That is my prayer. Nothing else will cure this pain. Nothing else will make any difference of any kind. Nothing else will ever matter. No one else will ever matter. Not like that verse does.</em>Kathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07875437304634395430noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7269064068470906619.post-1809037698931591432012-09-07T20:51:00.001-07:002012-09-07T20:51:47.664-07:00maybe you'll be lonesome tooOne of my favorite things lately is the concept of "brutal honesty." Let's face it - without honesty, I am a failure. Forget the moral implications of dishonesty. Not being brutally honest with others led me into a pit. Complete and utter darkness. Dishonesty was, essentially, what broke me. Lying to others about what I was doing, feeling, thinking - that was the most foolish thing I've ever done. I still shake my head at myself when I remember how I lied to my best friend's face. She asked me how school was going, how my grades were, and I smiled and nodded and said, "Everything is <em>fine.</em>" When I was actually screaming on the inside, desperate, but too scared to do anything to help myself. My friend was throwing me a lifeline, and I was too afraid to take it. If I had only been honest with her - who knows what might have happened.<br />
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And now for some brutal honesty. Here it is. This might shock you all - brace yourselves! - but I am fairly certain that I want to be married more than anything else in the world.<br />
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There. I said it.<br />
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I suppose this really isn't particularly <em>brutal</em> honesty. I like to think I'm not the only person in the world who feels this way, for one thing. And for another, I've said this before. This isn't some huge, outrageous confession I'm making. My friends have known this about me for quite some time. I'm sure that most people would assume it about any 24-year-old woman who has spent her entire life single and continues to do so. <br />
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I have always known that my perpetual singleness was a blessing, an absolute gift, from God. I knew that if He had allowed the boy(s) I liked to pursue me, I would have regretted it later. I would have regretted the relationships I so desperately coveted at the time. Yes, coveted. Everyone else around me was (and still is, to this day!) in a relationship of sorts, or if they weren't, it didn't matter to them. Not like it did to me. What was wrong with me? Why did none of the guys I knew <em>ever</em> seem to think I was girlfriend material? <br />
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I suppose if they had, or if I had had slightly more conservative parents, I might have taken the whole "purity ring" approach to things. I always knew I was going to remain a virgin until my wedding night. That was, and has always been, the route I've chosen for myself. No one in my circle of friends has ever thought it was weird. It was the route all my friends chose for themselves too, back in the day. Losing your virginity would have been unthinkable. It was so unthinkable, in fact, that I imagine that's why we never bothered with purity rings. We didn't need them. We<em> knew</em> we would be virgins until marriage. There was never any other way.<br />
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And I always wondered when I would meet <em>him. </em> The boy who would actually see me in a way that none of the other boys ever seemed to. The boy who would actually <em>do </em>something about his feelings for me. The boy who had the guts to pursue me. Fellas, I realize it's a terrifying thing, pursuing a girl. If you ask her out, she might say no. OUCH. But the other option is far more terrifying: <em>she might say yes.</em> And <em>then</em> what do you do?? I <em>know</em> it's scary, either way it goes. And I've been waiting nearly 24 years for that guy, whoever he is, to screw up the courage and just freaking ask me out already.<br />
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I'm not done waiting for him. And I've realized something else...<br />
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I may always be waiting for him.<br />
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If I never marry, I will go to my grave waiting for him. My husband. I will spend my entire life waiting for my husband, even if he never comes. That's just the way it's going to be.<br />
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But something else I've realized...<br />
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I'm not waiting for my life to begin. <br />
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I'm not waiting for God to come through for me.<br />
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I'm not waiting for God's promise of abundant life.<br />
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Because I already have that. I already have my Beloved. I already have the joy of Christ, the salvation of His blood, the forgiveness from my sin, the grace and peace and eternal life He promises. I have His blessing, I am His treasured child, an heir with Christ. I am not <em>waiting</em> for Him to bless me with <em>my</em> idea of abundant life in Him. <br />
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I already have it.<br />
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Yes, I am waiting for someone, and I am not pleased that I have been told time and time again that I must wait, and keep waiting, and keep waiting, and wait some more. If I had a nickel for every time I've pleaded with God to change that answer, I could probably buy a month's worth of groceries. If I had a dime for every tear I've shed because of how much this endless waiting hurts, I could probably just buy out the grocery store. Just tonight, writing this entry, I have wept. I have wept because I am so tired of waiting, and there is no guarantee I'll ever stop. I have accepted the fact that I may wait for my husband for the rest of my life - and he may never show up.<br />
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But I'm determined I'll submit. I have told God, as I grit my teeth to bear the pain, that I would do whatever He asked of me. I believe in His total, utter and complete <em>goodness</em>. I believe in His infinite wisdom, the fact that He knows my heart, which is desperately sick and deceitful, better than I ever will. I believe in His ability to provide, and I also believe that He is all I will ever need. I don't <em>need</em> a husband. I don't <em>need</em> children. I don't need anything, except that which I already have: <em>abundant life in Christ.</em> <br />
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This obedience and submission sucks. It really does. (More brutal honesty.) It hurts so much. I would love nothing more than for the waiting to stop, for my idea of abundant life to begin. I almost wish God would apologize to me for putting me through all this pain and making me wait so long and never really rewarding me for my absolutely <em>unending</em> patience. Really, I have been a saint through all this. Isn't it time I got what I want for once??<br />
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He isn't a <em>tame </em>Lion.<br />
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I am to submit. He knows. He knows our weaknesses and our limitations. He bore those same things Himself when He was human. He knows how much my fragile, desperately wicked heart can handle. He knows how I can best bring glory to Him - as a wife and a mother, or just as a daughter, a sister, a cousin, a niece, a granddaughter, a friend, a teacher, a mentor. He knows. And on top of everything that He knows - <em>He loves!</em> Oh, <em>how</em> He loves us so! <br />
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And if our God is for us, then who could ever stop us? And if our God is with us, then what could stand against? <br />
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What could stand against?Kathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07875437304634395430noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7269064068470906619.post-51022945409874862312012-09-04T00:00:00.004-07:002012-09-04T00:00:48.355-07:00I don't have time to maintain these regrets when I think about the wayOh, the sweet simplicity of genuine transparency!<br />
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Is the grass really greener on the other side?<br />
Never know until I see it with my own eyes<br />
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Repentance must be real<br />
Sorrow, sorrow must be great<br />
Heartache must be felt<br />
For these worldly chains to break<br />
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Thank you once again to Ashley Jones for summing up my exact feelings right now. Oh, the sweet simplicity of genuine transparency! To be real with someone, to say what needs to be said...and the feelings that come when you realize you <em>didn't</em> say everything that needed to be said, you<em> don't</em> understand the answers given, that that transparency is actually translucency, which on second thought <em>will not do.</em><br />
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Is the grass really greener on the other side? I will never know until I see it with my own eyes. And I can't see well enough through the translucency. I can see something, but I can't tell what yet. I need to know, and I need to see it with my own eyes.<br />
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Heartache must be felt for these worldly chains to break. Brokenness. Something I know very well, yet when I think of all the ways I could have been broken, I feel like I barely have a scratch on me. Other people experience more heartache in their lives than I could ever stand. Other people could live through multiple experiences, the least of which could absolutely crush my soul, kill my spirit, wound me beyond repair. Heartache must be felt for these worldly chains to break. My heart aches right now. I'm tired, I'm so tired, and not just because it's nearly two in the morning. Not just because I haven't slept well in weeks. My heart is so full. There is too much on my mind. I can't bear it. I can't bear it. <br />
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<span class="text Matt-11-28" id="en-ESV-23488"><span class="woj"><sup class="versenum">28 </sup><sup class="crossreference" value="(<a href="#cen-ESV-23488A" title="See cross-reference A">A</a>)"></sup>Come to <sup class="crossreference" value="(<a href="#cen-ESV-23488B" title="See cross-reference B">B</a>)"></sup>me, all who labor and are <sup class="crossreference" value="(<a href="#cen-ESV-23488C" title="See cross-reference C">C</a>)"></sup>heavy laden, and I will give you rest.</span></span> <span class="text Matt-11-29" id="en-ESV-23489"><span class="woj"><sup class="versenum">29 </sup>Take my yoke upon you, and <sup class="crossreference" value="(<a href="#cen-ESV-23489D" title="See cross-reference D">D</a>)"></sup>learn from me, for I am <sup class="crossreference" value="(<a href="#cen-ESV-23489E" title="See cross-reference E">E</a>)"></sup>gentle and lowly in heart, and <sup class="crossreference" value="(<a href="#cen-ESV-23489F" title="See cross-reference F">F</a>)"></sup>you will find rest for your souls.</span></span> <span class="text Matt-11-30" id="en-ESV-23490"><span class="woj"><sup class="versenum">30 </sup>For <sup class="crossreference" value="(<a href="#cen-ESV-23490G" title="See cross-reference G">G</a>)"></sup>my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.” ~Matthew 11:28-30, ESV</span></span><br />
<span class="text Matt-11-30"><span class="woj"></span></span><br />
<span class="text Matt-11-30"><span class="woj">I know what I've agreed to. I know what I've said, I know what I've promised. And I know beyond the shadow of a doubt that I'm where I'm supposed to be, accomplishing what I need to accomplish. I <em>know! </em>I'm <em>sure</em> of it! </span></span><br />
<span class="text Matt-11-30"><span class="woj"></span></span><br />
<span class="text Matt-11-30"><span class="woj">I just can't help longing for the sweet simplicity of genuine transparency.</span></span><br />
<span class="text Matt-11-30"><span class="woj"></span></span><br />
<span class="text Matt-11-30"><span class="woj">I wonder when I will ever see the other side with my own eyes.</span></span><br />
<span class="text Matt-11-30"><span class="woj"></span></span><br />
<span class="text Matt-11-30"><span class="woj">I wonder when these worldly chains will break.</span></span>Kathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07875437304634395430noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7269064068470906619.post-54464222311825021832012-08-14T16:16:00.000-07:002012-08-14T16:16:25.017-07:00don't you worry your pretty little mindToday I saw a friend who I haven't seen in 3 weeks. Knowing today would be the first time I would see him, I woke up this morning thinking of what I would be telling him. Things that have happened in my life, how school and my apartment and everything is all going. And I realized something.<br />
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My life is about to be absolutely amazing.<br />
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No, seriously.<br />
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I'm totally freaking out right now...but there's no reason for me to. <br />
<br />I feel that I ought to be completely and totally frightened. <br />
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After all, I am going back to school. The place where my life totally fell apart. The place where I failed more miserably than I've ever failed before. The place that scared me out of my mind. The place that brought on more pain than I've ever experienced. The place that led me into severe depression. The place that broke me.<br />
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But this time, it's all different.<br />
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I live in an apartment, <em>not</em> the dorms. (Oh, the dorms...) I live with Sam, my cousin and best friend, instead of some random girl I've never met. And our apartment is everything we have been planning it would be, and then some. It's the most perfect place for us. It literally could not be more perfect, unless it was a little bigger, but I am not even complaining, it's still so perfect just the way it is. I have wanted to live in that apartment for the past three years, and I have wanted to live with Sam for the past year, and now we do live there. And it's everything I needed and wanted it to be, and more.<br />
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I have the most perfect class schedule ever. EVER. As follows:<br />
Monday: 11-11:50am Voice Class<br />
1-2:20pm Sociology<br />
5:30-8:20pm Reading Education<br />
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Tuesday: 2:30-3:50pm Band<br />
7-9pm BSF, Genesis study (not a class, but the most amazing Bible study ever!!!)<br />
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Wednesday: see Monday<br />
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Thursday: 12-1:20pm Flute Choir<br />
2:30-3:50pm Band<br />
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It couldn't be a more perfect schedule. It really, really couldn't. <br />
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And the part of me that remembers last time I was at school is trying to freak out...but there isn't anything to freak out about this time. <br />
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I have two years of ministry under my belt, and that has taught me more than any class or any experience ever has. Two years of youth ministry and BSF leadership and job struggles and friendship changes and growth. It's been insane, but it's exactly what I needed to prepare me for school again. <br />
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This is my anthem and this is my song<br />
The theme of the stories I've heard for so long:<br />
God has been faithful and will be again!<br />
His loving compassion, it knows no end<br />
All I have needed, His hand will provide<br />
He's always been faithful to me!<br />
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Praise God for His faithfulness and provision and mercy and grace and utter, complete <em>goodness.</em> That's all I can do. All I can ever do.Kathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07875437304634395430noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7269064068470906619.post-61222804299714768682012-07-04T16:10:00.000-07:002012-07-04T16:10:08.357-07:00we neither believe what either can sayI am about to move. I move into my new apartment in SIXTEEN DAYS!!!! Oh my goodness. My first ever time to live away from my parents (except for that one dreadful year in the dorms...but let's not revisit that). My first time ever to live on my own. And I am going to live with my cousin and best friend, Sam!!! Everything we've talked about for the past year is actually about to happen! This time last year we concocted this idea of how neat it would be if I went back to school, Sam moved to Texas and we lived together. I didn't think at the time that it would really, truly happen - well, that's not totally true. I knew it could and it seemed so right and it seemed like such a God thing and it seemed like it would - it just seemed a tiny bit too good to be true. <br />
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But it is true! It is happening! Sam and I move into our apartment - the apartment I've wanted to live in for three years - in sixteen days!!!!! Sam lives in Texas now, and I am going back to school! I AM LIVING IN THE AUSTIN STREET APARTMENTS WITH SAM AND I AM GOING BACK TO SCHOOL!!! OH MY GOSH OH MY GOSH OH MY GOSH!!!!! I can't believe how faithful God is to have allowed all this to fall into place. This was all the best case scenario. I never believe in best case scenarios. Ever. Oh me of little faith. I live too much in the expectation that God will take blessings away from me, rather than pour them out in more ways than I can count, as He always has and always will. I can do nothing but fall on my knees and praise Him and thank Him over and over again for His grace and blessings, and pray the prayer I've been using too much lately: "I do believe - help my unbelief!" (Mark 9:24) <br />
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There is so much to do before the 20th! So much cleaning and sorting and throwing away and organizing and packing and moving furniture. It is a little overwhelming but more exciting than anything - what a great time to throw away a ton of stuff I don't need and organize my things in my own house! The idea of decorating and arranging my own house is just so exciting! Sam and I will have an incredibly impressive bookcase and DVD collection - between us the numbers will be in the hundreds easily. We'll have a little furniture shopping to do too. We need a kitchen table and chairs, plus Sam needs to get a mattress and box springs, and we'll probably need an extra bookcase or two, just for good measure. Ikea, here we come! And we need dishes, and cookware, and some spare linens and towels, and OH MY GOSH we are about to move into our apartment! AAAAAAHHHH!!!! This is so crazy!!!!!!!!!!! <br />
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Also, I'm desperate to see Brave and The Amazing Spider-Man. <br />
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ALSO, I'm BEYOND excited for Friday, which is friend day with Peter and Chandler, and then this weekend, when Sam and I are road tripping to Lubbock to visit Cody and our grandparents! I am desperate for 12 hours of discussion of life with Sam and as much family time with Cody and the Gs as we can manage. <br />
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God has blessed me with the best family and the best friends in the world and I am so thankful! All praise and glory to Him for His awesome goodness!Kathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07875437304634395430noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7269064068470906619.post-81296167881381534492012-04-24T20:03:00.000-07:002012-04-24T20:03:00.420-07:00People throw rocks at things that shineJust some thoughts on my mind, with help from last week's BSF lecture :)<br />
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How often do you look in the mirror? What do you see when you do? What things do you try to highlight? What things do you try to hide? What do you hope people see when they look at you? <em>Are</em> you really what you want people to see? Or do you want them to see something completely different? <em>Why</em> do you look in the mirror?<br />
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I look in the mirror constantly. When I get up in the morning to go to work, I dress myself and make sure my shirt is tucked in, my pants are zipped up (!), my hair is up nicely and my makeup is done. All of that involves standing in front of the mirror for 5-10 minutes, depending on how long I've overslept. Then, when I'm at work, I constantly check my reflection in windows or any reflective surfaces to make sure my hair still looks nice, I haven't sweated off my makeup, I haven't spilled anything on my shirt. I am <em>always</em> looking in the mirror to make sure I still look like what I want to be - which, if I were to be completely honest, what I want to be is desireable. Desireable as an employee, a server, someone you want to be around. Whatever the context, I usually want to look - and <em>be</em> - desireable.<br />
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But when I look into the mirror of God's Word, what do I see? Do I see a mature Christian, complete in Christ, a servant with whom He is well pleased? Do I see someone covered in His righteousness, made right before God, His beloved and treasured daughter? Hopefully I see all of those things - and more. God's Word as a mirror shows us in right standing before God through Christ's blood, but it also shows us the work we have yet to do. What we are rooted in will blossom on our lips - wise speech reveals minds that are fixed on Jesus. James 3 tells us that no man can tame the tongue, but with God's help, we can use it for His glory. Being consumed by God produces peace that comsumes our relationships - do you have any difficult relationships in your life? How will you ask God to produce peace in your relationships? Will you allow yourself to be consumed by God? We all experience God's amazing grace - but are you mistaking His grace for His approval of your actions, when in actuality He is waiting for you to grow up, to mature? I know I do this. How can I change, Lord? How can I continue to grow my faith in You?<br />
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Prayer is an excellent way to start. Wise prayer provides protection and removes doubt - what do your prayers look like? Are your prayers merely the words you sandwich between "Dear God" and "amen"? Too many of mine are. Do you praise God for who He is? Do you praise Him for His love, His faithfulness and mercies which are new every morning? His almighty power, His knowledge of <em>everything</em>, His perfect plan, His beautiful creation, His absolute and total <em>goodness?</em> Do you thank Him for the blessings He's given you? His financial and material provisions for you, the roof over your head and the food on your table and the clothes on your back, your job in this wretched economy, the resources for academic and spiritual education that are right under your nose any way you turn, the friends and family He's given you? The work He did on the cross on your behalf, sending His only Son Jesus Christ to die for your sins so that you could spend eternity with Him in heaven? How can you - how can I! - not thank God <em>every day</em> for these blessings? And these blessings are merely a drop in the ocean, the tip of the iceberg, of everything God has done for you and for me. Will you commit to pray and thank God every day? Will you pray for those who are in need, for those who don't know the Lord, those who are broken, abused, rejected, scorned, bullied? Those who need encouragement? Who need financial aid? Medical care? Protection of any kind? Nothing - absolutely <em>nothing</em> is too small to pray about. God cares for the tiniest of details - will you take those to Him too?<br />
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Will you look in the mirror and ask God to show you what He wants of you? What will you see the next time you look in the mirror?Kathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07875437304634395430noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7269064068470906619.post-14673100060344043202012-03-15T12:33:00.002-07:002012-03-15T12:46:55.182-07:00take a sad song and make it betterI'm pretty sure I've just accepted a fact I've been trying to deny for a long time. And that fact is: I'm probably not as much of a writer as I'd like to think I am. I've become one of those super annoying writers who whine about the fact that there's a brilliant novel locked in their heads and they just cannot get it out. To be fair, writing is really a full-time job. If I really wanted to write my novel, I would need to devote at least 3-4 hours a day writing it. Not something I am able or willing to do at this point. Most of the time, I just can't be bothered to write, as evidenced by the date of the last entry in this blog. January 16. Almost exactly two months ago. I feel as though I promise myself things and then do not have the self-discipline to see them through. I've promised myself to write my novel - haven't written a sentence in weeks. I've promised myself to read certain books by the end of the month - haven't even bought them. I've promised myself to work on some stuff for the school year - haven't even given it a thought. Sigh. Story of my life.<br /><br />But I'm really trying a few new things! I really am! I'm re-reading <em>The Great Gatsby</em> and <em>The Great Divorce </em>for the first time since high school, and I'd like to write reviews of them when I'm done. I'm making an audio recording of <em>The Voyage of the Dawn Treader</em> and <em>Pride and Prejudice and Zombies</em>, and hope to perfect my technique along the way. A rather strange life goal of mine is to record audio books and get paid to do so! I don't see it as a particularly realistic life goal, but a life goal it is nonetheless. And yes - I still want to write my novel. Maybe once the school year ends in May, and I will have more time, I will devote an hour a day or so to writing. In the meantime, I'm going to try to stop sounding like such a whiny little poser and just write what comes. And since I have an hour or so of alone time left, I believe I'll work some more on my audio recordings.<br /><br />Also, I finally joined GoodReads. Here's hoping I make something of that!Kathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07875437304634395430noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7269064068470906619.post-16594454846494516662012-01-16T19:35:00.000-08:002012-01-16T20:08:46.159-08:00we're moving along in a yellow boatI just bought a new Jodi Picoult book - Change of Heart - and first of all, anytime I read any of her books, it makes me ache inside. The profundity of her statements, however minute or trivial, or devastatingly heartwrenching, is something I can only dream to achieve in my own writing. But her statements about God - and I try to remind myself it’s merely her fictional characters thinking these things - make me writhe inside. Her world is so many thousands of shades of gray, and while she’s often quite possibly correct, her views on religion and God are just twisted enough that I can’t stand it. Her view of religion is restricted to Roman Catholicism, and people who go through the motions but don’t live the life they hear preached to them every Sunday (or holiday they choose to attend) at Mass. Priests who are closeted pedophiles, or murderers, or drunks, or at best pompous windbags who can whip out the names of all the saints in one breath but who don’t even notice the brokenness of the people they meet in confession. These are people who have been wounded, who have given up on the idea of a God because they don’t understand how He could allow the suffering that they have endured and still call Himself a just, loving and merciful God. People who believe that God does not understand what He’s asked them to endure, that God hasn’t had the exact same temptations and limitations, that He hasn’t had to watch His Son die, too. People who take justice and judgment into their own hands because God's version just isn't working for them. I want to write a book that tells of who Christ is, and who we are. I want to do that with the same profundity as Jodi Picoult - and I'm working on it. <br /><br />I want to write of broken people who in their brokenness reach out to God and find Him. <br /><br />I want to write of people who find their strength in Him, who soar on eagles' wings and run without growing weary.<br /><br />I want to write of people who humble themselves and find joy and give thanks in all circumstances.<br /><br />I want to write of people who forgive others the way Christ forgave them.<br /><br />And yet I want it to be real. <br /><br />I want my characters to be flawed. I want them to be broken. I want them to screw up. I want them to be sinners. <br /><br />It's being written. It is. And soon part of it will be posted....Kathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07875437304634395430noreply@blogger.com0